BING | Teen Ink

BING

May 19, 2009
By Kayla Heier SILVER, Colgate, Wisconsin
Kayla Heier SILVER, Colgate, Wisconsin
8 articles 0 photos 0 comments

A blonde beauty staring at her reflection in the mirror of the doors, thinking she can take on the world. “Woman inpowered.” She said to herself. The doors swoosh open a tsunami force sucks inside.
“Keeerrrrkeeerrrr.” Darth Vader crackles loudly and heavily like a broken television.
“HIII, I’m Barbie. What’s your name?” Barbie says in an annoying high pitch Chihuahua squeal.
“Keeerrrrkeeerrrrr.” He glides in like on a conveyor belt.
“Like, oh my god, duh. I can’t wait to be at my beach house with my hot pink convertible.” Barbie squeals once more with a banana wide smile on her face.
Darth Vader pushes a button going up; the space around the small black number lit up like the sun.
“Ohhhhhhh, pretty!” Darth Vader hears to his annoyance behind him. They stood in silence, the loud noise of Darth Vader’s deep crackle breathing. “Keeerrrrrrkeeerrrrrrr” fill the air like static from an old television. The doors retracted open, revealing a man appearing to have wrapped himself in the British flag. With a smile teeth were revealed that almost broke the mirrors all around them.
Barbie couldn’t help but notice his fashionable thick black rimmed glasses. “Going up?” asks Barbie excitedly as she puts her thumb up.
“Yeah, baby!” Austin Powers said as he eyed the groovy blonde next to him. “How’d you like to take a ride on my shagadelic private jet later baby?” He winks at her.
“Now, now,” she says, pursing her lips into a smile as if to hold back her stomach from exhorting any type of organic nature friendly food she had eaten earlier in a friendly sort of fashion. “I respect my body and boundaries just as any all American girl should do, and I ask you to do the same.” Stumbling over her own pink stiletto pumps, she scurries to the corner, pink cheeks flaming like the inside of a strawberry. Barbie takes an inhaler out of her small plastic pink purse as quick as a fox would take a hen out of a coot in the dark night, and huffed with the suction as well as the volume of a vacuum.
“Keeeeerrrrrkeeerrrrrr.” Darth turns his bulky head towards her direction. “Barbie, I am your father.”
Simultaneously Barbie and Austin’s mouth and eyes widen with the elevator doors swooshing opening.
BING!


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