An Address to My Lesser Peers

                                                            Sheldon Cooper

     Hello, it is me, your leader. I present myself here today to introduce another one of my brilliant ideas. I am preparing to rule the world. As your current student body president, I order you all to recollect all the changes I have made for this school for the better. Look at oneself and one’s adjacent. Look at how much they have improved. Your work, schedule, and knowledge have catapulted you in a way only I can replicate. I plan to ameliorate as many people as possible, as I did for you all, to formulate a better society. I not only dream of such a utopia, I am the only one qualified to make such a world. 

     I began high school at the age of 9, and I have an intelligence that far exceeds any other candidate. With my knowledge, I can make the right decisions for everyone. Imagine being alleviated by war, politics, disunity, and illiteracy. With me as a world ruler, there will be no disunity, no worry of making the wrong choice, and no misinformation. Wouldn’t everyone want to live in this paradise? 

     So, help me. Help me become a ruler. Help me help you. Help me help everyone. For if you do not, the world will continue depleting, and eventually, you will all be at your knees begging for me. I can see that to the common man, this concept is bewildering. Let me put it simply. If I can rule a high school, I can rule a city. If I can rule a city, I can rule a state. If I can rule a state, I can rule a country. If I can rule a country, I can rule a continent. If I can rule a continent, I can rule the world. 

     It has been simply laid out, and it is only logical that you lead my campaign. I will then use all of the world’s resources to prove string theory and solve the most intricate conjecture in physics: the theory of everything. A most beautiful equation. One much more beautiful than any of you. To campaign for my reign, you will need to advertise totalitarianism. Spread the truth. The truth is that my dictatorship will solve all problems. 

     Live long and prosper.