I live in the corrupted mind of a 14-year-old girl. It is a world where there are no answers to millions of questions. My best friend was the only one who could save me from myself that summer. Lying on the cold grass, staring up at the stars, it felt so cliché, but completely fulfilling.

The stars acted like every poisoned teenage mind that summer night. Ever since January my life had been going completely downhill: I got kicked out of school, lost my parents’ trust, and lost the things that meant the most to me. I was dead inside and needed to escape. But where do you go when drama fills your life from head to toe? I picked the front lawn.

We sat there as the world slipped through our fingers. We sat and talked, an occasional tear sweeping down our cheeks. I imagined being a star and all I could do was look down at us. I saw our curly tassels of hair dangling from our bright faces. We didn’t know the cruelty of what was yet to come. Not knowing of sex, drugs, and violence, we spun in little flower-patterned dresses, our small faces gleaming with joy and happiness. In reality, we were cold, tired, and upset teenagers wishing we were different.

As our bare feet clenched the lawn, we felt as if we were no longer stars, but small blades of grass. Harbored in every field, atop every mountain, we were tipped over and crouching toward the small things that made us who we are. I wished we could stay glued to the ground and never leave that spot. Away from where we knew we were safe--where society couldn’t steal our opinions or emotions, where we weren’t told what to be. Lying there on the grass, we were us and that was all.

Teenagers… we’re undefined treasures to the eyes of adulthood. The older we get, the farther we get away from ourselves. We become as distant to our innocence, as the stars are to us. We become a backstabber to the stranger we once were. My best friend and I just sat there. We knew this moment would end. We held each other knowing the surfaces of our personalities were pathetic, and yet all we could see was the deep under view of who we really were… who we really are.