"Dont waste your time" the first words i ever remember my mother saying. "Way to f*** everything up" were the last words to come from my mothers mouth....... " Hey there beautiful" the first words i remeber my father saying. "Get your ass over here" the last words he said. .... being able to witness both of these deaths gave me a new perspective on life.... 4 years I have been at Teen Correctional Facility. Next week is my 18th birthday and I will be released on good behaivor. ...... Today is my birthday and I have been released. As the ladys gave there goodbyes the each one by one returned back into there cells leaving me to walk out the twin doors that held me captive for so long. I am finaly able to escape. What relitive would want to take me in? that was the first question that was asked as a free woman. My Aunt Chris and her husband Mario let me live with them for a week. Then they got blown up by the meth lab they had in the kitchen. With no one else wanting to help out I decided to live on my own for the first month my adress was simply the Viking Park. Then I moved downtown and lived with this pimo named carlos. That was the worse decision of my life. that decision made my life a living hell for 3 years then i overdosed on oxycotton. Because I was such a liability Carlos let me go. Today is the day that my mother was murderd. I went to her grave but I didnt weep, I just told her she had it coming and set 3 dead black roses on her grave stone and left. Not even two months later I found the love of my life. Donovan made my whole life complete, when we would cut a line and the sweet burn was done i would walk by my self feeling the speed take me over. my 25th birthday I got shot three times and stabbed once by my younger brother jr. "How dare you come here b****" the first words he told me "Please help" were the last words he spoke. by the time I hit 27 I had decided to commit suicide. First three were fails......... "I dont deserve to live" the first thing I said the morning of my death " Goodbye , I am sorry" The last words I ever spoke on earth. Death isnt what you think it would be. I am stuck in a middle grey world surrounded by evil beings. There is no heavin there is no hell everyone, good or bad will be stuck there is no escaping haveing to live in this world in pain forever....