Breathe

Crunch, crunch, crunch, I hear the autumn leafs, I look up.

There he was.

Standing in front of me.

Looking me in the eyes smiling, reaching out touching my hair.

I thought to myself "no, no, no why are you here? Why would you touch me or even smile at me." My eyes felt heavy, my mind is running everywhere.

"What if he does it again?" I wondered.

You asked me how I was; I clenched my teeth and closed my eyes, my hair blowing in the wind like the shedding trees, wishing this was a dream.

The cold breeze quickly broke my wish telling me it wasn't... My heart is beating uncontrollably; I hear his whispering all over.

I am broken.

You left me to tell my sister something I would have never imagined telling her. Something a sister should never have to tell one another. My hands shaking and breathing became harder. It felt like I was in that room all over again reliving every moment over, and over.

Watching the leafs blow away, wishing I could just blow away too. You’ve broke apart of me forever. Ill always be scared, you've scarred my whole childhood. I know you think that what you did ruined the little bit of a relationship that I had with my sister, but in the end, hopefully it will all work out for me, not you.

I hear the wind picking up, and smell the cold autumn breeze blowing in at me as I told you "Come in" I listen to you walking behind me, I looked you back in the eyes, took a deep breath and looked at the ground, as I lost myself again.

What you don't realize is you have actually helped me out in some ways too. My sister and I are closer then ever now. I used to ask "hey, do you want to go.." and before I could even finish my sister would slam the door in my face screaming "no!" or I would ask "can you help me with something?" and she would just walk away from me leaving my heart aching.

I dreaded the day I had to tell my sister what happened, but I realized it was for the better. I couldn’t handle this myself, I needed help, help from somebody that I knew would know how this felt. Ever sense I have had to sit down and tell my sister what happened between me and you, we have grown together. My sister knows this isn’t my fault, and that I would never want this to happen. I would never take somebody from her, or even try. My sister is one of my best friends in the world. If she was still around here, I am sure she would be asking me if I wanted to do something with her. I’ve realized that no matter what happens sisters will never be broken. My sister and I are going to be, forever close.