Beetles and Butterflies | Teen Ink

Beetles and Butterflies

May 21, 2014
By NicLiang BRONZE, San Jose, California
NicLiang BRONZE, San Jose, California
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

I’ll be honest with you. I am not popular. People don’t like me. I’m the kid who sits by himself during lunch and doesn't really have any social life to worry about. While everybody else is getting used to the high school life and worrying about relationships, clothes, and partying, I’m stuck in my own little world. I go home everyday as quickly as I can and lock myself in my room, because that's the only time when I’m not alone. This is because within my room reside my only true companions: bugs. Insects, arachnids, and creepy crawlies make up my entire world. Everything about them fascinates me. I have dozens of clear plastic containers in my room with creatures ranging from worms and beetles to spiders and mantises.
I try to keep my “hobby” a secret because people don't approve. Ever since I brought a dynastinae (rhinoceros beetle) to class one day in eighth grade, I’ve been regarded as the weird kid. Doesn’t matter. I don’t care what people think of me…
That’s a lie. I do. But my concern falls solely upon the burden of one person. A girl. Andrea Schmidt. German. Smart. Beautiful.
I usually try not to concern myself with members of the opposite gender, but this girl makes that impossible. I think about her all the time, and the thought of seeing her is the only reason I make myself presentable in the mornings. However, there is a problem; there always is with me. Andrea is one of the more popular girls in school. Envy of everyone; everybody either wants to be friends with her, or they simply want to be her. And me? Well I’m just a creepy loner who collects bugs. How could I compete with the entire school?
I dabbled in my emotions and kept my feelings to myself for months until one warm spring afternoon. I was just on my way home when I noticed Andrea sitting alone on a bench just outside of campus. But something was wrong. She was usually outgoing and social, so it was weird to see her hunched over with her face in her hands. Then it hit me: she was crying. This was my chance. I finally had a chance to introduce myself and maybe get to know her a little better. I thought about it for a while, and after about five minutes I mustered up the courage to walk over and introduce myself. As I walked over to her, everything slowed down. This could be huge; this could be a turning point of my life; I could finally get this girl. As I was within just a few steps of her, the worst thing possible happened. Another guy swooped and sat right next to her, and from the look of his letterman jacket, he was an athlete. I had to watch as he hugged her and comforted her. That could’ve been me. That could’ve been me…

From that moment on, I began to go under a sort of, forgive the bug pun, metamorphosis. I went to the mall and bought my self some nice clothes; I went to the barbershop and got a sharp haircut; I went to the drug store and bought some deodorant, hair gel, and other hygiene maintenance. The next day, everybody stared. It was as if a new guy had just entered our school and was the talk of the entire population. And I was. I got the attention wherever I went, girls began to look at me and really notice me, and it really was as if I was a new person. No longer the bug kid, no, now I was somebody, I could have a chance for people to like me, and to actually like people.

As I was walking down the halls, I saw her. Andrea Schmidt. But something was different, she was under the arm of the jock I had seen comfort her. This surprised me, but not nearly as much as what I felt next. Emptiness. I simply didn’t care. I was beyond her now. I had so much more to look forward to. I didn't need the approval of one girl when I could have that of an entire school. I realize that I come off as a jerk when I say this, but come on. I spend my entire life a loser with no friends, and now I have the opportunity to be…POPULAR. And I’m going to take it.

After a couple of days going through the same routine, I was getting a little bored, to be honest. I needed something extra to really push me farther up the social pyramid. Then I realized: people find passion irresistible. I need to show everybody my passion for wildlife without receding to my previous self. A perfect scenario presented itself during my Biology class: a new assignment to help students appreciate nature. Bring a picture of your favorite animal and talk about its situation in nature, i.e. endangered, ecosystematic responsibilities, and overall impression.

Day of the presentation, I was excited. Everybody bought pictures or printouts, but I was sitting at my desk with a covered plastic tin. When it was my turn, I stood in front of the class, pulled off the cover, and revealed a beautiful monarch butterfly. Its orange wings and deep black accents dazzled the audience and prompted “ooh”s and “aah”s. The memories of the little boy who brought a beetle to school and was shunned because of it were instantly erased and replaced with a mature young man who amazed his peers with the beautify and elegance a simple butterfly holds.

I never got the girl, but I sure did achieve something more. I became liked. No longer do people look at me and then look away as to avoid eye contact, but rather they maintain gaze, smile, and greet as we pass. No longer am I the awkward kid eating lunch by himself in the corner, but rather the passionate, changed, peer. No longer am I shunned, but rather liked.



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