“We are not autotrophs like plants. We are Heterotrophs, because our bodies cannot produce our own food.”
In the back of the science room sat a misunderstood kid. He knew that his day would come where he could prove the teacher wrong. He always listened to every detail just waiting to hear a flaw. Maybe this would be his day. Listening closely to the teacher’s definition of an autotroph he shot his hand up. He had caught a mistake! This was like the time when he went fishing and he sat there six hours not stopping to eat or go to the bathroom and in the end he had caught a sardine.
He felt the Adrenaline rush through his undeveloped body, which was much skinnier than it should be.
“Yes, um what’s your question?”
“You’re wrong!”
“That is not a question.”
“I never said it was a question; you did.”
“Um. Okay. How so?”
“I make my own food!”
“We are not talking about cooking.” He didn’t realize that the little boy thought deeper than just cooking. He had a ridiculous semi-good argument.
“No, no. Look, see I’m an autotroph! I eat my boogers! And if I get a scrape or something I lick the blood!” The boy was as excited as h***. Everybody in the other classrooms down the haul could even hear him shouting, “I eat my boogers!” Happier than ever. The teacher stood there. Although it was a ridiculous statement, he had no comeback. The more he thought about it, the more he considered it.
The boy left that day telling everybody he was an autotroph. It was one of the few perks of being that nerd who still ate his boogers. Although it was a small and slightly embarrassing feat, it was still a feat. It was like that time he caught a sardine. Now, at that moment standing in the schoolyard he realized he had just reeled himself up one juicy sardine.