The floor was made of tile and though the outside of the house looked new the inside did not. The walls were thin and the chairs were supposed to be painted white but the it had worn off. There was 2 bedrooms, one bathroom, one laundry room, one living room, one kitchen, and one single me. Of course my mother lived with me because I was only 14 but it felt like I was alone. All the constant nagging about leaving the peanut butter out with the knife in it or sleeping in too late didn't matter. If those things went away I would be alone. I looke down at my shoes. Spray painted black. She hated that. I found a can on the side of the street, nearly empty, and sprayed them right there on my feet. She was horrified. I wasn't. I was releived. The bright pink brought way too much attention to the rest of me. But she made me get them. I gave up on my mom a long time ago. Ever since Gramp's died and she didn't even take me to the funeral I have pulled away. "I know your upset, Laurie, but I have work. I can't take you." That's what she said. I look at the clock. 4:47. I just got back from school. My homework load is ridiculous. Like always. I pull myself up and drag my feet all the way to my room. It's small with one bed, one desk, and one closet. Nothing else except my clothes and backpack. I don't keep anything. I drop onto my bed and as I fall I feel like the whole wight of the world is falling with me. Everyday of school is torture for me. Every single person in the school is happy. Not the kind of happy you get from being in a beautiful place. It's a little different. It appears the same but instead the person expressing their happiness is faking it. They want to apper happy so no one else know's their pain. I've tried faking it. It's exausting. So I've given up. I've converted to utter darkness. I kind of like it because on the outside everyone avoids you because your wearing black and have an angry look on your face. But on the inside your happy. Really, Truly happy because I am showing people different. I am not the same as every single freaking person in the whole single freaking world. I look at the clock again. 4:59. I start to fall asleep but I am awakened when I hear the door front door open. I lift my head to hear better. Footsteps come towards my door. I am standing now staring at the door. Someone starts to push my door open. And then the person steps into veiw. "Mom? What the hell! Could you have said something? I was about to call the freaking cops!" I said harshly. "Oh! I'm sorry. I just assumed you were sleeping and I didn't want to wake you." She responded. Well that's a first. "Whatever. Do you need something?" I ask with the intention of getting her to leave. "No. Nothing. Just checking on you." She says. "Okay. Well, I'm fine. Nothing else to see here." I say. A year ago this would have torn my heart in two to say to my mom but I've stopped caring. "Okay. Tell me if you need anything. I'll be in the kitchen." She sounds ridiculous. Trying to be normal. We are nothing like a normal family.