A short story about hiding the pain for so long

Her thick dark brown curls pressed up against the car window as she laid her head pressingly against it. Her throat was tight and her heart aching more than it ever had before. She tried to keep it within but nonetheless silent hot tears trailed down her face leaving a burning cool sensation where they went. She instantly, by habit, wiped them off using the back of her shaking hand. She was miserable but refused to show it for so long. She sat, in the moving car, for what seemed like hours. When finally the figure in the driver’s seat pulled into the driveway to a place she was supposed to know as “home”. She gathered her composure and put on a façade to make it seem as if nothing was wrong. She grasped the pull out handle on the door and, with a small amount of force, opened it. Immediately the mid-October wind danced around her and leaves blew around, she gave a look to her isolated neighborhood. Among this was a mis-array of laundry swaying back and forth in the wind, used Coffee cups sitting lazily on porch tables, and a small child’s broken tricycle standing by the side of the road. Other than that there was nothing. No laughter. No dog’s barking. Just a town without its people. A neighborhood full of nothing, a town of shadows.
The girl turned away and took another deep breath looking towards the figure who then turned around to look at her. “You okay kiddo?” She forced a broken smile and prepared to perform her usual act replying with a commonly used, “Haha, no I’m fine. Just tired that’s all!” Upon which the figure naively smiled and said “Okay, just ’a checking!”
The girl then walked up and entered the worn out old garage – pieces of drift wood and scrap metal scattered here and there and the musty smell of kerosene and cobwebs hung damply in the air. A thin coat of dust could be seen blanketing the 1969 silver stingray corvette who had long ago held much meaning but now sat alone in the garage waiting to be repaired. There was nothing special about this garage in particular, just a cluttered collage of dull silver, greys, and blacks. Her heart pulsated as she tried to force her eyes away from looking at the only thing that held life and meaning in the room. But by force of habit her curious eyes wandered there anyway. Set up against the wall behind a workbench sat a canvas of sorts. It was a simple 5 by 5 mahogany framed picture within. Encased in it depicted a family of 6. Genuine smiles could be seen plastered on their younger faces. A family together and united by one common thing- love. An elderly lady was seen centered in the picture wise-eyes gleaming with a bright aura around her, her hair fell like a waterfall to her shoulders and her eyes were a deep but iridescent hazel. To either side of her stood two young girls, sisters, alike in stature who looked of the ages 8 and 6. Behind them in the second row stood the mother of the two young girls, and her sister as well. And finally with his hands resting lovingly on the elderly woman’s shoulders stood the grandfather. Together they were a reminder to the girl of how things used to be. That family photo would hang triumphantly against the white walls in the family living room, sun shining against it illuminating the whole room. But now it lie dusty behind a workbench in the garage a sun-bleached outline in the room, with yellowed walls where it used to reside.
The figure turned back and noticed the girl staring at the memoriam. He stood there, at first not knowing what the young girl was looking at, but then saw clearly and he too was mesmerized, staring with her as if he’d never seen it before as well. In his old and tired blue eyes clouds of grey gathered and threatened to pour over. He quickly turned and retreated to his room to change with pain in his beaten heart.
She walked away from the tangible reminder and mindlessly ascended down the stairs into her room. It was sparsely decorated, with a mattress of blankets serving as her bed. She planned to save up to purchase one, but money was tight as it was and she could wait. The room was small with one burgundy table lamp lighting the room but nonetheless she liked it. It was hers and it was her place of solace after everything that had happened. The pain stabbed like a knife and twisted in her stomach as it spread to other parts of her body a fresh wound reopened as more tears poured out. She was alone, but she liked it better this way. Because while she was alone she didn’t have to pretend anymore. She didn’t have to act like everything was okay, like there was nothing wrong when deep down inside she knew she was falling apart.
She laughed weakly, repeating to herself the words everyone seemed to tell her “Oh you’ll be fine, things are going to be okay.” How they would know, she whispered. Everyone liked to pretend they had the solution and know how to everything, but the fact was…they didn’t. No one does and that’s what makes life so interesting. The experience, the mistakes, everyone taking the journey of figuring out things on their own, of learning and trying to teach others. Knowing that nobody will have the true answer. Relative truths being considered facts and false prophecies being paraded on by those who considered themselves to be more powerful and just than the one next to them. She winced and turned on her side as she watched the shadows. They whispered and spoke to her reminding her of a time when she felt loved and safe. But now the girl felt more alone than ever and the shadows now only hid her darkest secrets and worst nightmares. She shut off the lamp light and let the room cloak itself in darkness. The tears fell profusely and this time she didn’t bother to wipe them away. She couldn’t go on like this. No matter how hard she tried or how much she wanted to. This was it. She squeezed her eyes shut and took a deep breath. Silver flashed in the darkness and the girl took a breath and let the pain escape, before falling into a well-deserved and much needed slumber.