Everyone wants to say their own opinion on something. How they want to say that’s stupid, you’re absolutely wrong. How they want to say hey, good job. Describe how they’re doing, what are their plans for the night.

To say I love you.

Except you can’t. Well, in my case it is. No one can speak a word. The government are the only ones who can talk. They are the voices of our society. We have no say in anything, and no one has ever stood up against them because they’re scared. People who talk, even whisper, are caught. Hidden cameras all around our city catches them. Guards arrest them, and they’re never seen again. Are you wondering how I know this?

My dad, when I was little said I love you to my mother and I. The next morning guards barged through our house, cuffing him and dragging him out. I remember looking up at my mom, she opened her mouth, probably to scream or to tell them to stop. She looked at me though, knowing if she did, she too would be arrested. And I would be alone.

So she didn’t speak a word.

I saw though, the pain in her eyes, tear welling up in her eyes. She held me closely to her, stroking my hair, her way of soothing me and of telling me she loves me. I cried silently in her shirt, my tears soaking into her shirt. Minutes later, he was driven away, and we haven’t seen him since.

That was 11 years ago. Now, being 17 and going on 18 in four days, everything is good. Waking up by the city sirens around every neighborhood so everyone wakes up at the same time. Mom makes breakfast, everyone heads to work or to school at exactly 9:25. Cars are driven, people under 20 forced to walk to school. People at the age of 20 or older go to work. Both teens and adults are to be home by 9:00, weekends 10:00.

And I think you already know what happens if we get caught if we aren’t tucked in bed by those times. Second question you’re probably wondering, how do you learn if the teachers can’t talk? Robotic voices are specialized for each subject. Math, science, you name it. Papers, laptops and chalkboards are used. Work for the adults, same robotic voice, probably as boring as hearing the same monotone voice all day sitting in a classroom. I stared out the window, silently wishing I could just shout “This is a waste of my life!” and walk out.

A girl can dream, right?

As the hours went by, everyone walked out of class, carrying their backpacks and silently walking back to their houses. Opening the door into my house, right away smelling the amazing aroma of mom’s cooking. I hugged mom, going upstairs and doing my homework. This was the cycle. Homework for an hour, go downstairs and eat, help with the dishes, go back upstairs take a shower, brush my teeth and go to bed.

Maybe it’s just me, but has anyone stopped and glanced around, thinking why are we here? How boring our lives are? What’s the point of our existence? I couldn’t sleep that night, thinking about how life is. How it’s not worth living. I quietly walked downstairs, trying not to wake mom up, and did something that would change my life forever.