He was older than she'd thought he would be.

But still looked charming.

Cheng Xiao thought.

The man sitting in the hospital bed gently looked at the girl who broke into his ward and looked up and down at him. He held the cup with his left hand and asked her after drinking a sip of water, “Hi sweety. You cannot find your family?”

The girl shook her head.

    “You need help?”

    She shook her head again. If not because he saw the kid had an obvious smile on her face, he would be worried if something bad happened to her.

    Suddenly, there was a soft bang in the doorway. The big one and small one looked toward the doorway at the same time. It was a pretty woman in her early thirties. Her sight first fell on the girl. After seeing her, obviously, she breathed a sigh of relief, “Xiaoxiao, I told you not to run around. If the nurse hadn’t told me that you ran into this room, who knows how long it would take to look for you.”

Cheng Yan, the man on the bed, saw the woman and stared at her blankly for a second. Then he looked at the kid. No wonder the little girl looked familiar, was this her daughter? He put the cup back to the table. When he looked back at them his expression was already gentle again.

Jiang Nuo finished talking to her daughter, looked up to the man on the bed and said, “I apologize, sir. The child…...” The unfinished words stopped abruptly after recognizing who the person was on the hospital bed. She had never thought she would meet him again. Jiang Nuo looked at Cheng Yan who was in the hospital gown, frowning, “Are you sick?” The words blurted out with nervousness. Just like ten years ago, her concern for him had never been covered up, and there was no need to cover it up now.

Cheng Xiao was the kind of girl who couldn’t hide anything in her heart. Ever since they had left the hospital she looked concerned. At bedtime, under the repeated questioning of her mom, she hesitantly told her mom what she had heard from her great-grandparents, “Great-grandma said, that year SARS broke out, as a medical staff he joined SARS confrontation medical team at the end of March 2003. Later he perhaps was infected with SARS. But it was ‘perhaps’, great-grandparents were not one-hundred percent sure about it.” Cheng Xiao was afraid that her mother was worried the man would have SARS, so she emphasizing the word “perhaps.”

Jiang Nuo laughed after hearing it, comfort her, “It’s alright. I am fine. Well, you need to sleep; tomorrow you need to go to school.”

It is one thing to comfort the daughter; it is another thing to think about it quietly throughout the night. Jiang Nuo could not fall asleep. In the morning of the second day, Jiang Nuo went straight to the hospital after sending Cheng Xiao to school. Surprisingly, she saw a woman in the ward. Her footsteps unknowingly paused for a second, then she raised a smile, naturally saying hello.

She put the food that she brought for Cheng Yan, going straight to the point and asking the pale faced man who was sitting on the bed, “Is she your wife?”

Cheng Yan did not expect her to ask so directly. He looked into Jiang Nuo’s clear eyes with a little surprise. The idea that he originally had to let his friend pretend to be his girlfriend to make Jiang Nuo give up the compound suddenly disappeared.

After a long silence, Cheng Yan said, “No, she is not.”

The facial expression of the woman who sat on the sofa did not change. But the peel which Luo Ci was peeling was broken, which showed her not-calmness.

Jiang Nuo nodded, didn’t say anything more. Just then, her phone ran so she left the room temporarily.

Other people couldn’t tell, but Jiang Nuo understood his silence. Cheng Yan could see that she still had him in her heart. Ten years passed, she, Jiang Nuo, was still the girl who loved him with all strength. So he was not willing to let her down again.

How about him? Does he still have her in his heart?

Luo Ci stood up from the sofa, walking to the front of Cheng Yan and looking at him seriously, sighed, “Cheng Yan, since we were both young, I liked you. But I knew I had never been in your heart, so I did not pester you. I just got divorced and came back to China. I thought it was a chance given by God. I knew you and the girl have been divorced for many years and by coincidence you were going to have surgery. I thought this was the chance to let me walk into your life.” She gave a wry smile, “I didn’t know until now that the fate of people really can’t be forced. I have come to visit you every day recently but I feel that I am still far away from you. However, Jiang Nuo, you two have been separated for a decade, and she is still the person who is living in your heart.” Luo Ci paused for a second, finally, before leaving, said, “I wish you happiness.”

The words in her heart spit out, she suddenly felt a lot easier. Sometimes, you can't get anything if you force others, but happiness may come by perfecting others.

“Thank you, Luo Ci.” Except those two words, Cheng Yan said nothing. The world of affection was not fair.“Sorry” and “it’s fine” do not exist. The former was meaningless and useless; and whoever said “I’m fine” was not really “fine.”

Before the elevator, Luo Ci saw Jiang Nuo, who was about to go back to the ward, they said hello and peacefully passed by each other.

Jiang Nuo suddenly stopped her steps in front of the door.

After she hung up the phone, she went to the doctor to ask the condition of Cheng Yan.

As expected,, Cheng Yan was suffering from SARS. Although later he recovered, because of the numerous use of hormones, he had sequelae. The most serious was the femoral head necrosis. The common symptom of femoral head necrosis was the pain. The pain was located in the hip joint, near the thigh, and could be expanded to the knee, also the hip activity was limited, especially the limited rotation activity, or painful and short claudication. This hospitalization was intended for artificial total hip arthroplasty, which could restore walking ability after surgery, but might also cause other illnesses.

Jiang Nuo’s head was full of gentle faces when she saw him yesterday, and the understatement "Nothing, a small illness. Just staying here for a few days." Suddenly, tears came up. She put her eyes tightly on her arm as if it could suppress the emotions, but it was useless, tears couldn’t stop flowing out.

Behind her was the sound of the hurrying steps. Here, at the inpatient area of the hospital, everyone was used to helpless cries, and nobody could do anything about pain.

Jiang Nuo stood at the door of the ward for half an hour and cried for half an hour. She wants to comfort herself: "Isn't it just a hospitalization for an operation? Is this worth me crying? It is not a life-and-death." She also wants to rush in and criticize: "You’re an a**hole! Such a big thing how could you hold it by yourself?" She even wanted to leave without saying anything and never saw the inside guy anymore, whether he was alive or dead, healthy or unfortunate, it would have nothing to do with her in the future. But in the end, she was soft-hearted and opened the door.

Cheng Yan came out of the bathroom. He just washed his face, the forehead's hair was damp, so softly placed in front of his eyes. He was a little surprised to see Jiang Yan's red eyes. Taking out two bottles of ice water from the small refrigerator for her, let her apply on her eyes: "What happened?"

“Seriously you are asking me what happened? The doctor told me all, how could you conceal this big thing from me?” She said a few words, the nose started being sour again, “Why did you divorce me that year? Are you afraid that I would break up with you once you get SARS infection? Am I that kind of person in your eyes? ”

Cheng Yan went to the sofa and sat down, slightly frowned, looking at the girl who followed him and sat next to him: "How could the doctor tell you about my situation?" The hospital's confidential work was doing very well, not the patient’s family members cannot get the patient's condition.

Jiang Yan smiled: "I told them that I am your wife, who just returned from abroad." Her smile is a little proud, proud of her own small cleverness, but the the man before her frowned more.

“Why? You are not pleasant? To have a pretty and cute wife like me is your luck.” She murmur.

“No, I am not pleasant.”

As soon as the words became spoken, Jiang Nuo’s face changed to pale. She pressed her lips tightly, staring at him and couldn’t say half a word.

He leaned on the back of the sofa with no facial expression, and his tone could not hear the mood: "Nuonuo, we could not get along with each other. Don't waste time on me. I can see that you are married, maybe just divorced," he thought about her daughter, and said, "Although I am still single, it does not mean that there is a possibility between us."

"Cheng Yan." She stood up, read his name with gnashing her teeth. "You had dated with me for more than a year, until a month after marriage you found out that we didn't fit! You reflex arc is enough to circle the earth twice!” Jiang Nuo slammed the ice water at him. She felt wronged, but couldn’t cry, just shuddered and said, "Do you know how hard I have been in these years?"

Jiang Yan left. Cheng Yan was still sitting on the sofa. He slightly closed his eyes, and rubbed his temples with his hands.

In fact, those words were against his heart.

Jiang Nuo used to be a soldier. She was the kind of person who looked weak but actually stronger than anyone else. He did not expect that she could cry that much for him. He felt sorry and wanted to say something to comfort her, but he did not know what to say. The ten years, twenty years in the future, until death, his condition would get worse and worse. In the end, he couldn’t even walk. He would rely entirely on wheelchairs. When would this day come, no one knew, and with the weakening of the body's immune system, this day would only come faster and faster. How could he bear to let a girl who used to laugh only often worry about his body in the future?

Cheng Yan was smart. He clearly knew how to make Jiang Nuo mad and not come back. However, Jiang Nuo was not stupid. She was even smarter than him. Also he could do nothing with her stubbornness.

After a few days of medical examination, Cheng Yan finally started surgery on the sixth day of her admission, the fourth day Jiang Nuo left.

The operation went very smoothly. After he woke up, he first noticed the strange feeling at hand. Looking down, he saw a small head - it was Jiang Nuo.

He was gazing at her for a long time, and finally, he could not control him to raise his hand and pat her head. He sighed: "Silly girl, why are you so stubborn?" He was smart, Jiang Nuo was also smart. On that day, Jiang Nuo was so mad that she didn't notice his difference. But after she calmed down for two days at home, she understood why the words were spoken - he hoped she left him; he did not want she to be worried. So she ran back to find Cheng Yan and she knew that he had no energy after the operation to have another quarrel with her, also he was not willing to argue with her again.

Jiang Yan was worried about him, so she didn’t sleep deeply. She woke up when he just when he moved. She sat up, squinted her eyes, glanced at him, said, "You are silly", and then rang the bell to call the doctor.

"You tell me, between the two of us who is more stupid? When the SARS outbreak, you didn't say anything and went on the front line to save people and cure the disease. I have pre... I have been at home for two months and have not eased my mood. You joined the medical team to fight against it later was infected with SARS, until now I don’t know if there anybody took care of you. Let's talk about the two days before. You stupid thought I was also stupid, thinking using a few sentenced to make me give up to compound with you. Look at you right now. You even could not take care of yourself. You thought how noble you are?” She sat seriously at his bed, counting his "faults". Cheng Yan looked at her, suddenly laughed.

She is so cute, he thought.

“Hey, can you be serious?” Jiang Nuo patted him.

After the doctor checked, Jiang Nuo learned that all Cheng Yan’s indicators were good after his operation, she was really relieved. She unloaded her strength, leaned on the bedside, and chatted with him.

The door suddenly was opened. They looked toward it, the coming person was her daughter.

“Hi, dad! You are awake!” Cheng Xiao looked at the person sitting on the bed, yelled happily.

"What? How do you know he was your father?" Jiang Yan was stunned and sat up straight.

Cheng Yan was too shocked by the girl who suddenly appeared and called him"dad" to say anything.

Cheng Xiao said seriously, “I saw the photo under your pillow. On the back of which it was written: ‘Cheng Yan.’ Then connect it to my name, it was easy to know.” Not waiting for Jiang Nuo to answer, Cheng Xiao ran to the bed with joy, “Dad, please let me do an introduction of myself. My surname is Cheng, the first name is Xiao. The Cheng is the one same as Cheng Yan.” (In China last name is put before the first name)

Cheng Xiao told her father all the stories that she had experienced. Til the bedtime she was unwillingly brought to the home by her babysitter.

“Finally she’s gone.” Jiang Nuo took a deep breath, said.

“You didn’t tell me that you were pregnant?” Cheng Yan hesitated asked.

Jiang Nuo pouted, “The day I got the medical report you gave me the document of divorcing. Did I have a chance to say it?”

"Nuonuo, sorry." Cheng Yan reached out and held Jiang Yan in his arms. He finally knew what Jiang Yan said in that day, "how hard I have been in these years." It was really not easy for a single mother to raise a child alone. He was sorry to have left a woman and a daughter for so many years - even if it was not his willing, he still did. He also felt sorry that he missed the child's childhood and missed the growth of her every step.

“Sorry? Sorry for what? For leaving us for many years?” Jiang Nuo leaned on him, said, “Actually, on this thing you are right. Country and people are always the first. But you should not do anything without letting me know. I had the right to know it. We were a couple.”

Cheng Yan did not respond her. He was quiet.

As Jiang Nuo almost fell asleep in his arm, she heard he said, “Nuonuo, in the future, all the things about me I will let you know. Are you still willing to know them?” His voice was deep. She could feel the vibration of his chest. She could hear the heartbeat of him.

She unbelievingly looked up toward him.

Is he proposing?

“Nuonuo, I have nothing, only the person before you.” Cheng Yan said, “But…...” He wanted to keep saying but interrupted by Jiang Nuo, “Not sincere. Where is the ring?”

He smiled, “I will make one up for you later.”

“Don’t waste money.” Jiang Nuo's hand went around the back of her neck and took off the necklace.

It was a ring, which ten years ago Cheng Yan used to propose. A decade passed, it looked still new.

Jiang Nuo saved it very well.

Cheng Yan took the ring, seriously put it on her finger, said, “Thank you, Nuonuo.”

Thank you for forgiving me.  Thank you for willing to believe me again.

Thank you, for loving me.