Why does he do this to me? The perfect guy. The perfect man. He tells me he loves me, but sometimes I don't know. Sometimes I wonder whether he means everything he says. He always has a way to pull me back to him though. Thinking about leaving hurts. It's like withdraw. I can't leave him, because the feeling I get when I talk to him, it's amazing. I get high on the fact that he loves me and wants me to be his.

Maybe if I just didn't think about it. If I just left without considering the option of staying. Maybe then, I could leave without it hurting. But all I want to do right now is drown out life. I don't want to hear the consoling words of people who are telling me he's a player. I don't want to here them criticize him.

Here he comes again. He struts up to me with the most confidence. He puts a strand of my hair behind my ear and kisses me on the lips. All I can do is stand there. It's just a plain feeling. I know this is just going to end with me having more questions streaming through my head like river rapids. He pulls away from me with his brows furrowed.

"What's wrong?" he asks. He searches my eyes for an answer. His hand drifts to mine and I shake my head I can't look at him or I will just fall in love again. All over again. I will fall head over heels for him. And he won't care one bit. He knows he has me wrapped around his finger, whether it's the little one or not. I just can't turn away. I sigh and lay my head on his shoulder.

"I don't know what's wrong." I just close my eyes and breathe quietly. He wraps his arms around me and hugs me tight. See, this is what I'm talking about. That hug. That one hug. It's already melted me into nothing. I won't have the strength today, to tell him that I'm done with his game. I'm done with me not knowing who is trying in this relationship. I don't think I'll ever have the strength. No. I know I never will. Ever.