The rain was soft. It felt cold on my shoulders. Oddly enough the cold felt good. I stopped to look around me. Rain made the world look different. It made everything seem blurry and magnified. It was almost as if you were seeing everything from a different view. It would be so much easier if reality worked the same way. That way you only saw the best things and the bad things were left blurry. I looked up toward the deep-blue and purple sky. Everything around me was so complex and beyond my understanding. The Chicago buildings around me were tall and stood proud. I felt so insignificant and small between them. I guess this is how people feel when they are in love. It isn’t just people around me anymore. The feeling’s consuming me too. The rain started pouring down. In seconds I was completely soaked. I ran my hand through my dripping hair. This was life.

“Earth to Seth”, a girl exclaimed on the side of me. She was drop dead-gorgeous. Her eyes were the most brilliant sea-green. She had one dimple on her left cheek. Her hair was strawberry blond. Her curls were princess like. Her smile was mischievous and playful. She had water dripping from her hair too. The cold weather made her teeth chatter. I had to stop this right now. It hurt me even to think about her. I took off my jacket.
“Here, take this” I told her. She looked hesitant so I slipped it around her shoulders. She surveyed me curiously.
“What about you?” she asked.
“I love this weather” and, “It doesn’t really bother me” I responded back.
She playfully punched my arm and said, “You’re so weird Seth, but in a good way.”
I leaned back and smirked at her. “I try my hardest” I said.
She put her arms around my waist, “Come on let’s get out of this rain” she laughed.
I pulled her arms off of me. Her face looked hurt. I quickly covered up by saying, “Race you back to the car.” I watched her smile turn back to being playful before I started running.
“No way am I going to let you win” she said racing ahead. I slowed my pace and let her reach the car before me. I had to let her win. She opened my small blue convertible and hopped in. It was good that today I had put up the cover of the car. I reached the car and tried to open the door. It was locked. This was just great. I felt my jean pocket for the keys and realized…oh great. I looked into the car. Lily stuck her tongue out at me from the window.
“Open the door” I told her irritated. She shook her head and made faces at me. Okay, if she wanted to play games I could do that too. I put my hand on the door handle and pulled. Then I pretended to look hurt and held my hand in my other hand. I made a sore looking face and then I sat down on the pavement turning my back to the car. The car door opened and I turned at the same time and pretended to get hit by the door. “Ouch, my head hurts too now” I groaned.
“Oh my god, Seth I’m so sorry” she sobbed. Then I got up quickly jumped into the car and locked the door. “Seth!” she exclaimed. “I hate you” she yelled at me. I turned my face around. “Okay, fine I’m sorry Seth” she sighed. I unlocked the doors and it made a click sound. She rushed to the handle and opened the door and sat inside. We both started laughing hysterically.
I hadn’t done something as childish as that since we were both in the seventh grade. I had fallen in the mud at a soccer game and felt ashamed even though we had won because of my fall. I wanted to look as nice as possible for my crush sitting in the bleachers so I had raced to the car to change. Though, Lily was already in the car and had locked it. She had mocked me the same way she did now. In fact, she even made me stand there begging for her to open the car, while my crush walked past. The girl had given me this puzzled look. I had felt so angry with Lily that I didn’t share my favorite milk shake with her or invite her over to my house after the game.
That seemed like a long time ago. We were both seniors now. Lily had been my best friend since the fourth grade. She wasn’t like the other girls. She wasn’t any less beautiful either, but she was always in the moment. If there were guys skateboarding she would ask them if she could learn. If there were girls having an argument about whether Robert Patterson was better than Taylor Lautner or not she would cringe and yell out that Tom Felton beat them all. She was the one girl who everyone wanted as a friend, but she had decided that I would be her friend. I on the other hand was not the least bit interested. I had my buddy, Aidan on my side. We were like brothers except nicer and more cheerful about hanging out together. Though, she immediately grew on Aidan and we all started to hang out with her despite my issues with hanging out with girls. She was irritating. Okay, I lied. She was really nice and not at all that girly. We became the “Three Troublesome” which everyone liked. I mean we weren’t horribly mischievous, but wherever we went excitement was there. Now it felt like our group was splitting up. All of us were headed to college and it seemed we were all busy with our own path.
I was headed to become a lawyer. I had just gotten an acceptance letter to Harvard. Aidan wanted to be an architect. He recently got his acceptance letter from Harvard too, but he wasn’t sure if that was the college he wanted to go to too. He wanted to go to a school that would be more focused towards his passion. Our teachers had been so shocked that two of their students had been accepted that they were talking about running a going away to college party. Lily wanted to be a fashion designer. A few companies had already asked her to work as an intern based on her doodles; not even her actual sketches. She was definitely headed to a great college too. It just made me realize I had to spend the most time I could with them, while I still had a chance.
Lily snapped me back into the present. “What station do you want to listen to?” she asked.
“Anyone you want” I answered back.
She gave me a hard look, “What’s wrong with you?” and, “You’ve been acting so distant lately”. “Your seriously letting me put on whatever I want?” she asked. I shrugged. I guess it was odd. I was always very specific about what music we listened to. It had to be really good.
“I guess I’m just tired” and, “It’s been a long week” I lied.
She stared at me fiercely and finally sighed. “I’m your best friend and you won’t tell me what’s wrong. How can I help you then?” she asked.
I pretended to look at the time. “It’s really late and your mom’s going to worry” and, “I’m going to drop you home”. I sped the car toward her house. I stopped it in front of her house.
“You want to come in?” she asked with pleading eyes. She had the door half opened. I usually dropped her at the door and sometimes Aidan would even play his guitar at her front door, while he waited for her to come out.
“I’m so sorry I can’t, but tell your mom she looks beautiful for me” I told her.
“Seth, I’m really sorry” and, “Why are you acting this way?” she begged me to answer her. “You are shutting me out completely” she said tearing up. The same girl who fell of her bike and didn’t cry was crying now. This was the same girl who had taken water balloons and thrown it at the guy who had cheated on her instead of crying. Today she was looking broken. I wanted to do nothing more, but to hug her and tell her it was all going to be okay, but I couldn’t. It would hurt way too much.
I gave her weak smile and answered, “You know how I am.”
She answered, “I thought I did” and turned around and ran inside.
My heart broke into a million pieces. I drove to the park near my house and sat on the hood of my car. It was still raining hard. This was the spot Aidan always took me whenever he was sad. He would drag me along to support his depression. This whole scene had repeated so many times this month. I would hang out with Lily. We would have a really good time and at the end of the day she would look sad. Today, I took it to heights. Lily cried and told me she didn’t know me anymore. Usually when Aidan was with us everything would be lighter and we wouldn’t get into fights. Though, ever since he took on tutoring for extra money to help his parents I was left spending time with Lily alone. At the beginning of the year we got along well and I guess we still do. Though, I started to realize how pretty and amazing she was. She made me feel like I wasn’t that insignificant and that I should take on the world. Then it struck me I was falling for her really hard. I didn’t want to be one of those people in movies that go out with their best friend and then break up. Those people never get their best friend back. I didn’t want to lose her or Aidan. I didn’t want Aidan to have to choose between the two of us if it came to it. I just started to distance myself from both of them. I was thinking that maybe if I didn’t spend that much time with her then I would get over my “crush”. My plan wasn’t working out. I wasn’t just getting over my crush I was losing my best friend too. That was the whole reason I was in this mess because I was trying to prevent that. It was for the best anyways. It’s not like she should be focused on me when she has her whole career ahead of her. That’s it, whether it kills me or not I had to stay away from both of them for their own sake. I hummed my favorite “Lincoln Park” song and drove back home.
Yesterday, I had talked to Aidan about how weird I was feeling. There had been other girls in the past, but Lily just stood out the most. He first laughed at me because he thought that I had been joking around with him. Then, when I told him I was serious he looked surprised and asked how a guy who couldn’t stand the sight of a certain fourth grader has come to love her in the twelfth grade. He started cracking up and I picked up my sleeping bag that I was going to use at his house that night. We were having a guy’s night. Our other friends weren’t over yet, but it didn’t matter anymore. I walked out of his house and headed toward my car. He ran after me. “Seth come on man, listen to me” he begged. I just kept walking. Since then, I ignored his calls, texts and refused to hang out. Lily had already planned us to go to a movie the next day so I didn’t say no, but I felt like I should have.
I got a bunch of texts from friends from school and Aidan. I didn’t read them. Then I saw my phone ringing. It was Lily. I had decided I would keep away from her so answering a phone call resided in the same category. I let it go to voice mail. Though, the phone rang again. This time it was Aidan. I let it go to answering again and stuffed it behind a pillow. I grabbed my clothes and decided to take a shower. Mom would be mad anyways if she saw my whole floor and me dripping wet. I got ready and flopped on to my bed. I picked up the newspaper that my mom probably left in my room when I went to take a shower. I turned to my favorite part of the newspaper, the political comedies. I guess I could be a nerd at times. Though, that was exactly what I needed. Hockey practice had been cancelled this morning so I didn’t really have a way to relax. I know it’s weird that Hockey relaxes me, but I really like skating.
My phone rang again. It was irritating me. I finally picked it up. “Hello” I said. I was surprised when I heard Lily’s mom on the phone. “Seth, Lily drove out with Aidan to go to your house, but then…” her voice faltered.
“What Mrs. Jenson?” I exclaimed.
“They got in accident, Seth” she cried. I dropped my phone on to the bed. This couldn’t be happening, not after all we had been through. I grabbed the phone and put it back on my ear.
“Are they okay?” I asked. Though, I meant were they alive? Would I ever get to hear another one of Aidan’s dumb jokes or go on one of Lily’s spontaneous “field trips”?
“They are in the hospital near our house right now and I thought you might want to see them” she sobbed.
“I’m on my way Mrs.Jenson” I said jumping of my bed and grabbing my sweater of the wall. I yelled to my mom, “I have to go to the hospital because Aidan and Lily got in accident.”
My mom looked concerned. “Are you okay?” she asked. “I will be once they are” I responded running out of the house into my car.
I couldn’t believe that this was happening. Why were they going to my house? I never called them over. I mean Aidan would randomly stop by, but never when I was upset with him. I thought about our fight and how I walked out. I hope that wasn’t the last time I saw him. Also, I hoped I got to tell Lily how sorry I was for acting like a jerk to her and why I was being so distant. In another five minutes I reached the hospital. I ran up to the service desk lady and got the directions to the room. In seconds I was at the door of the room. I stopped in front of the door. I hoped they understood I meant well and would forgive me. Most of all I hoped they were okay.
I looked over the two beds and Lily and Seth were cracking up. I studied them and then said, “Guys?” Aidan looked at me. He had a bandage around his forehead and Lily had one around her arm. They both had small cuts all over, but besides that they didn’t seem too bad. “How are you?” I asked growing tears. I didn’t even try hiding them. It was something worth crying for.
Aidan looks up at me and says, “Who are you?”
My soul died. I couldn’t breathe. “Aidan?” I begged. “It’s me, Seth” I said. The words barely came out of my mouth.
Lily looks toward me blankly, “He doesn’t remember you or anyone here. The doctors said he might have fatal amnesia from his head concussion.” I looked at Aidan and said nothing. Then I picked up my phone and threw it against the wall. I got up and ran out the door. I took my car and went to Aidan’s special place. It was odd how much life could hurt.
Days later I sat in my bed. I didn’t want to be near friends. I didn’t want to see Lily anymore. I should have answered Aidan's call. I finally remembered texts. Both of them had texted me. I took out my phone and read the text. My jaw dropped. Aidan’s text said, “I’m sorry Seth I should have taken you seriously. Though, guess what I found out? Lily likes you too. She told me you were acting so distant and she can’t pretend anymore. She said she knew you didn’t like her so she tried to act indifferent, but cannot anymore because it’s tearing her heart. Seth we are on our way. Stop pushing her away like you did when you were nine and grow up. She’s not going to break your heart.” That was the end of the text. My phone started ringing. It was Lily. I answered it with shaking hands. “Seth, Aidan’s got his memory back” and, “he doesn’t have amnesia anymore” she exclaimed!
“I love you” I answered back.
“What did you just say?” she said shocked.
“I’m sorry for being a major jerk” I continued on.
“Seth, stop” she cried.
“Please listen to me” I begged.
“I like you too” and, “Get your butt here” she said cutting me off. The phone cut off and I laid back on to my bed forgetting I was on the edge and fell off.
My mom came to my door hearing a thud. “Are you okay” she asked scared. “Better than okay” I exclaimed.
I leaned back against hood of my car. I was right next to my two most favorite people in the world. It started to rain. Aidan groaned, “No, the gel in my hair is going to die.” We all smiled. The rain had started it all. It was something I would never understand, but something we all needed. I knew it had to be true. Sometimes what you think is the best isn’t always the best at the time. I just needed to be a little soaked to understand that. I hugged my new girlfriend.
“Seth, your hair is dripping on me” she giggled, failing to act mad. It wasn’t working. I leaned in and purposely let it fountain on her. This was the way things had to be. I smiled. I looked over at Aidan and asked, “Hey Aidan did you seriously have amnesia after the accident? He smiled and gave his crazy laugh. Lily started laughing too. “Guys?” I asked confused.
“You are so innocent” they said at the same. “Whatever, I guess I’ll leave it a mystery since it did help me” I shrugged. I would have never read the text or talked to either of them if it weren’t for his “amnesia”. “You guys are messed up, but I love you” I said grinning.