Am I supposed to feel this hatred and betrayal? Is this how it normally feels to be gutted like a freshly caught fish? I no longer have those answer anymore. I told you how I feel time and time again, and yet those thoughts, those conversations don't mean a thing to you, whether it's my bleeding heart or it's my own fault for letting you get to close. I left those feelings in a locked box, never to see the light of day again. I gave you the key to keep me from feeling those feelings again. I only need to pass the time of existence called life to become a stronger person. I gave you the key of fortune and the open opportunity to be the person I ask of myself. And yet, you betrayed me. You broke those promises like a twig, you saw the bleeding heart in front of you, beating and losing blood by the end of every sentence from your lips and hanging off the edge of a noose from every smile. You saw the tears from my eyes, you saw your shadow self in the mirror, your eyes saw the perfect scheme to ruin an already broken man, I told you once I told you a million times don't open the box, did Pandora think the same as you in this moment? Did she think with such lustful desires and tendencies? I think not, she saw only out of curiosity and the idea of being the better person. You seek only the self redemption of being the tool that brought down the knees of the giant called love. You saw me as an obstacle that needed to be passed and moved along, you saw me as an objective that needed to be terminated. I gave you access to analyze each and every single vein in my existence and the idea that you could be the angel of mercy and break me. You looked straight into my eyes and saw the longful for someone to actually care and give a helping hand, and I admit I sought out feelings of love and compassion. What were you expecting? Me to never say what I felt? For me to keep it bottled up? You were the one to say let it all out and for you to lend a helping hand? I could have been digging my own grave in the slightest intentions to keep you in my life and to bring down my own self harm. But sadly you put it upon yourself to dig not your grave but my own separately one fro my feelings of which you stomped and burned with your own putrid intentions, and the other for the body. The lying maggot rotting corpse of the man that you called love.  I am the one who is the helpfulness the own self destruction to the ones I call friend. I want to be the end of the thing called sadness. Take my own life in the places of my heart and my soul? Madam you have sought out the own initiative to ruin my soul with the blackest of black paint called your own feelings. I already have made my peace with the demons who seek out my own self harming ideals. Have you my dear? You may have taken my freedom, my life and my love. I will have the last laugh on this occasion though my sweet. You see the grave has already been dug, and the body has merely been delayed the satisfaction of being placed slowly beneath the ground with all the dreams we had, all the time spent will never be recovered. All the time spent wasted on you, if I had known then what I know now looking at your face from the bottom of the pit you dug, I can see the wrongs of my ways of even thinking for a millisecond that any of your promises were good, I honestly can say now I wanna see those same tears I made in front of you all those years ago reappear in your lifeless, unforgiving eyes. Why? I am the victim here, I want to see the debts of my mistakes and your misleadings dealt with in ten fold,  I want the man in black to finally understand the pain and anguish I have had to deal with ever since I gave you that key. To many it seems like an ordinary key, all brassed and made to the obvious looking of a standard lock and key, but to this sick and twisted young mistress it's the only stronghold she needs to break the man she called love down to size, how and why? Those answers I still do not know my dear. I shall have my revenge my dear soon enough while my mind is separated from my body at the moment by these walls of death and ground, I shall see you soon, with the fullest intent to make your life the most hate filled and least likely place for a lady such as yourself to even consider not putting a bullet in your head every day and of every single waking moment. Now would you kindly shut your mouth and finish the job?