The sky was painfully beautiful, bursting in hues of pink and purple and orange, and on the inside I felt like I was dying.
Looking over at you in the driver's seat, I could see your doe eyes reflecting the colors, hushed with tears that mirrored my own. My heart was bursting, imploding, and the sky seemed so beautiful that it was ostentatious. Inappropriate.
A tear escaped and traveled down your cheek.
It was over, everything we had was going to be irrevocably changed because of what we did. I say we because a breakup takes two people. You were the match and I was water, you started it and I finished it, and in the process we broke each other's hearts.
That’s how it feels.
I feel broken.
I wished that our car was travelling back in time, to before you did what you did, to before we had even met, so that I could keep us from hurting each other. It wasn’t, though. I still wished that it was.
I knew that once I left the car it would be over.
By closing the door, I would be severing myself from you. You knew it too. For once in your life, you were driving the speed limit, but my house was only so far away.
We got there too soon.
I took my time collecting my things, slowly piling them on my lap. Were you looking at me? I could feel your gaze.
I ran out of things to collect.
I looked up at you, and the lips that I had traced and bit and kissed, and you skin and hair, which I knew the exact feeling of, and your body, your shoulders, which fit so nicely against mine. I looked at your eyes. They were screaming. I was screaming, but the car was so silent as we looked at each other.
You tilted your chin down, acknowledging me, acknowledging our ending, the final letter on the signature of our death warrant.
We were over.
I felt all the walls in my heart break, and I turned from you, so rushed, tumbling out of the car, tumbling away from this hurt and beauty and pain. The door shut and everything hit me, and I knew I was losing you, and I think I choked a little, looking back to watch your silver vehicle pull away.
The only thought I had in my head was a scream.
I have been screaming ever since.