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Fhallen
The darkness in the room spun around him, dizzying, putting him into a sense of vertigo. He put a hand out on the wall in an effect to steady himself. The drug was working too fast. He was going to come down too soon. He bit down on his lip hard and tasted blood. His fangs throbbed with the pleasure-pain. Shivering, he took a small step toward the door, determined to get to the bathroom. His sister would be over soon. If he couldn’t get to the shower, she was going to lecture him again. Leave him. Send him away. His throat opened up and his eyes began to water, his stomach has just hit the EVAC button and all systems were go. “Where the bloody hell is the bathroom?” he growled, stumbling down the hall of his apartment. He hissed in a breath as his foot caught on the oriental hall runner, and planted both hands on either wall. He took another step, with all the finesse of an elephant in ballet slippers. “S***.” He mumbled, fumbling for the bathroom door somewhere along the wall. Behind him a picture fell to the floor. Later, he thought, clean it up later.
After much effort, he fell through the entryway to the bathroom, falling against the counter. In a jumble of jerkily slow and confused motions, he got the shower running, cold water sluicing down his chest and legs. A long low sigh escaped his lips as he rested against his forearm on the wall in front of him, laying his head against it. “Fhallen? Brother mine, where are you?” Growling, he lifted his head, “Here, Khind, in the shower.” He could hear her set down her purse and keys. “Are you hungry? I’ll make some food.” He called out his agreement as a sudden darkness over came him.
“Fhallen? Brother mine?” His eyes fluttered and shifter beneath the caramel colored lids, but he did not lift them. He heard her sigh and felt her brush her hand over his head. “Brother, why do you do this to yourself? I’m so worried for you…”another sigh, “What can I do to help you?” Her voice hitched and cracked. “Nothing. I know you won’t accept my help…maybe you’re too far gone for me to help you anymore…Oh Fhallen…” He heard a light rustling, cloth against skin. “What would mother say if she knew?” She gasped when he parted his dry lips, as though he had surprised her. Am I supposed to be dead? He wondered, feeling out his limbs, without moving. Numb, as expected, and his eyesight, he hoped, was useless. As was normal given the fainting session and the hospital bed routine. Opening his ugly eyes was worthless so he would leave them closed. He licked his lips slowly, testing out the lack of feeling. Fhallen’s heart broke a little as his sister let out a soft sob. How he hated to lie here and listen to her cry, but there was nothing he could do. Her tears? His fault. Laying here like a corpse? His doing. He wasn’t going to blame anyone else for something he had purposefully done. But Khind, the soft-spoken, beautiful, kindhearted woman that he was honored to call family, did. She blamed herself for all his wrongdoings. Even if he was older by a few years.
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