Being original in this world is hard when everyone tries to do the same thing, wear the same clothes and fit in. The problem with fitting in is that no one stands out, and that is a reoccurring theme that we see in our everyday life. There are many ways to find out if you are a stereotypical white girl and it is very easy to become one as well.

The most prevalent white girl move is every time you make a trip to Starbucks, you must take a selfie, which is a picture that you take of yourself, by yourself. In the selfie you must hold the cup to show everyone how much you love your pumpkin spice latte that has your name written on it with a little heart. Obviously, fall is upon us and we all remember that the pumpkin spice latte is coming back on the menu even though you forgot to do your homework or say happy birthday to a best friend. If the worker at Starbucks happens to spell your name wrong, they better watch out because you are about to complain extremely loud so they feel bad about themselves. Starbucks will become the most important thing in your life and will become a daily adventure while it burns a hole right through your pocket.

Victoria’s Secret is your go to store when you are at the mall. You shop there 24/7 getting the latest style of yoga pants so you can look fit while still being trendy. Each catalog that arrives at your house gives you hope and makes your whole day. You can even look at it while you drink your pumpkin spice latte. The free items you can receive if you spend $100 at the store makes you feel reassured that this is your favorite place to be. The models on the cover are your idols and you strive to look just like them on a daily basis when you wear the same outfits displayed in the store and on the mannequins.

A white girl is always up to date on the new trends going on around the world. The most recent and popular trend is twerking. You must watch videos on YouTube to learn the proper technique of twerking. Once you have finally mastered the skill, you can then video yourself while pretending to be Miley Cyrus and post your video on Vine, the new site that is used to post six second videos. Then you can go on and say how much you miss the old Miley Cyrus, even though you are following in her footsteps while you twerk away to your camera.

At Christmas, or Hanukkah whatever religion you follow, holidays mean presents. At the top of your list is a new pair of furry Uggs that will perfectly protect your feet from the cold winter. Whatever pair you do not already own is the one that you will receive. There are so many styles of Uggs to choose from, especially since they have broadened their collection with several new sparkly pairs. Obviously the quote all that glitters is not gold, does not apply when it comes to shoes. The more glitter the better when you choose the right pair for you. Make sure that your best friend gets silver and you get gold so that you can mix and match on the coldest days of winter for a fabulous look.
Tanning is a must when it comes to winter. Pale skin makes it look as if you don’t care that winter is making you look like a ghost and you also blend in with the snow. A tanning bed is the best choice, but most white girls go for a spray tan leaving them with an orange complexion that makes them look like a star in the hit movie Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Be careful not to wipe off your spray tan in the snow or on your favorite blanket that you wrap up in when it’s cold.

Make sure that everything you owned is monogrammed with your initials on it. This is like marking your territory, telling everyone “hey, I am a white girl these are all of the expensive material items I own.” Everything from drinking cups to your backpack should be labeled to show everyone that you take your white girl status seriously.

Last but definitely not least, Mean Girls is the movie that guides your life. You must know every single word in the movie and quote it on a daily basis. The burn book is your Bible, and Lindsey Lohan is your inspiration. On Wednesdays you wear pink so that you are not shunned from the rest of the white girl society. And you can always remember that when life gets rough, at least you didn’t get pushed in front of a bus like Regina George did.

It’s not easy being a white girl, there are so many things that you must do to qualify it is hard to keep up. Now is your time to test the water. Take a nice walk with your yoga pants on and your sparkly Uggs on your feet. Don’t forget to go to the tanning bed and make a new twerking video, but don’t let the sweat ruin your spray tan. Take your monogrammed cup and have a Mean Girls marathon. Don’t forget that you are representing all white girls so you must look fabulous. Oh, and remember to get your pumpkin spice latte on your way out.