Surviving High School


I’ve never been able to fall asleep the night before Christmas, the night before my birthday, or even the night before St. Patrick’s day. But none of these compare to that night before my first day of high school. I’ve always had the same mindset as every kid, that school is miserable. And while I’ve absolutely abhorred these years of slavery, I MEAN, schooling, I knew that high school would change all of that. High School! I’d seen The Breakfast Club, so I knew all it would take was one trip of detention to swap earrings and saliva with the most prestigious girl in school. I’d seen Ferris Bueller's Day Off, so I knew I could skip class and miraculously hack into the schools computer to excuse myself, while having the entire student body calling to check up on me. I knew what to expect.

And thats when I walked in. Where are all 3 of my friends I had in Jr. High? Why are the hallways crowded with unknown faces, and how has every guy transformed into a UFC fighter? Where is Molly Ringwald, and why am I not making out with her? This was pretty far from what I was expecting. Now as I continued on with my day, class after class, I didn’t say a word to anyone, nor did anyone say anything to me, except of course when somebody commented on how laughable my Led Zeppelin shirt was. I couldn’t believe it, hours of movie reviewing made me believe that in high school, regardless of your stereotype, everyone knows who you are. I quickly learned that I had been mislead, and the only person that knew my name was the teacher who had it printed on her seating chart. I don’t think I’m alone in the world when I say that high school isn’t that enjoyable, and certainly isn’t how it’s portrayed in movies.
Our elders have told us the same thing for years; “High School can be a hard time, but it will all end eventually. There’s no reason to worry about teenagers, because they are all going through a phase and will eventually mature and snap out of the self-absorbed and unsympathetic trance they are in.” Unfortunately some teenagers don’t get that chance. According to National Suicide Statistics, 276,000 young adults between the ages of 15-25 attempt suicide every year, 5,000 of them succeeding. That’s 5,000 fresh young minds that will never get a chance to see how the rest of their lives play out, and hundreds of thousands more who will be permanently scarred.
The sad thing is, ending your own life is not the worst thing that you can do as a high school student. On April 20, 1999, 18 year old Eric Harris and 17 year old Dylan Klebold entered Columbine High School, at which they were students, and opened fire, killing 13 innocent people, and injuring an additional 21 before they both shot themselves in the head. The public was shocked, and nobody could believe anyone so young could be capable of causing such tragedy. But what’s horrible is that this event is no longer a unique one; since The Columbine Massacre, there have been 31 school shootings, most in which the perpetrators were still high school students. Something caused these kids to act out like this, and injure so many innocent people.
But not everyone who dislikes high school is going to go on a rampage and massacre other students, or even kill themselves. But there are alternatives that kids choose can put them at a disadvantage for the rest of their lives. The Childrens Trend Database reported that as of October 12, 2012, 8,300 high schoolers dropout daily. The same database tells us that a high school dropout isn’t eligible for 90% of US jobs. Why are these kids not enjoying school, and why are they, in a sense, setting themselves up for failure?

The problems that high schoolers face are becoming more and more apparent, but what are the causes? What is it that’s leading these kids to harm themselves, and other people? The biggest cause is bullying. I know. BULLYING. It’s not like you’ve been taught by everyone you’ve ever come across not to bully other people. We hear about bullying so much that we’ve almost become immune to the word, we know not to bully because we know the harm it does. Bullying is a thing of the past... right? Recent studies show that 1 in 4 teenagers are victims of bullying. How can this be happening? We all know not to bully, don’t we? The problem is our definition of “bullying”. From movies, media, and literature, we tend think of bullying as giving a student swirly, shoving them against a locker, or taking their lunch money. Well, this isn’t The Cosby Show, and those types of bullying have become negligible. But isn’t talking badly about someones clothing just as harmful? Or making fun of their hobbies? Or even the music they listen to? You see, bullying happens around us all the time, and we’re all guilty of it, we just don’t view it as bullying.
Another form of bullying is exclusion. When someone feels alone, anger builds up inside them, along with depression. Ignoring someone, or just failing acknowledge can be just as harmful as making a rude remark. As psychologist Dan Olweus put it, “Not being acknowledged by those around you can drive a person mad. In order to really understand what an individual is going through, they need to be heard, and they never will be if no one is willing to listen”. Nobody should have to feel alone for 3 of the hardest and most emotionally-driven years of their lives.

87% of school shootings are motivated by a desire to get back at those who bullied them. Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold were harassed, and called gay by their peers, which is the primary reason they entered Columbine High School and “got even” with those who harmed them. No physical bullying was done, but sometimes words are what hurt the most. An ABC News study says that half of suicides are related to “this thing that we have been taught our whole lives not to do”. The same study says that there are 160,000 kids every day who are missing school out of fear of the word we ignore, because it has become so cliche. Eventually many of these kids drop out because they have gotten so behind and fear going to school so badly. All because in order to boost our own egos, we feel the need to bash on someone, or simply ignore what they have to say. I imagine I’m not alone in this world when I say it’s not worth losing a fellow student.
So how can we; classmates, parents, and teachers, deter this violence and keep these kids in school? If everyone was willing to do their fair share, these problems would be virtually nonexistent. But the first thing that we need to do is acknowledge the problem. Bob Dylan says it best in his song “Blowin’ in the Wind”. “How many times can a man turn his head, and pretend that he just doesn’t see?” - Bob Dylan. Contrary to belief, ignorance is not bliss, and it’s about time we address the issue. I am not willing to witness any more shootings, any more suicides, and any more dropouts without trying to change something. If you see someone eating lunch alone, feel free to invite them to eat with you. Or when someone lives a lifestyle that you don’t approve of, keep your comments to yourself. Everybody thinks differently, and there is no reason you should feel superior due to your different mindset. And if you see a timid individual who you think has something to say, ask them to enlighten you on their philosophy.
Now granted that you can’t control what other people say or do, learn how to help yourself. Remember what the great German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche said, “what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger”. If anyone is rude to you, make that your motivation to succeed. Bill Clinton, Christian Bale, Emma Watson, and so many more successful people were bullied in high school. If they can make it through the hardship and suffering, so can you. And look forward to your future and the rest of your life. You know that if you drop out you won’t be eligible for most of the jobs out there, so use that as incentive to stay in school. Instead of skipping class, sign up for a painting class, band class, or anything else that you have an interest in.
Now imagine a utopia where all teenagers could accept one another's differences, and if they couldn’t, they’d learned to just keep their mouths shut. Imagine a place where the boy with dreadlocks could hang out with someone outside of the Bob Marley Fan Club. And imagine a place where the quiet homely girl you see walking down the hallway alone every day didn’t have to live in fear of the cheerleaders or anyone else talking down to her. All this is possible, as long as we address the problem and contribute individually. Maybe there will be fewer Eric Harris’, Dylan Klebold's, and Adam Lanza’s in the world. Maybe Lone Peak High School won’t have three suicides and one heroin overdose next year. And maybe there won’t be over 8,000 high schoolers dropping out nationwide every day. Now,maybe we won’t have the same high school experience as Ferris Bueller, and we may not have the entire school calling to check up on us to make sure we’re not dying, but life isn’t a movie, and it never will be. But if we all have a little compassion and look out for one another, it can be just as good as one. High School doesn't seem so bad anymore, I think we can all survive it just fine.