Oh, those holidays; they’re like Tim Tebow. You either love them or hate them. To some they may be the best days of the year. To some, they may be pointless and arbitrary. For some (who don’t really care), it’s a day off of school.. To me, a holiday can be any one of the three. It really depends on which one.

Since we’re on this subject, is a birthday a holiday? Some say it is, others do not. It’s pretty confusing. If I were to include my birthday as a holiday, it still wouldn’t be one of my favorites.. Since my birthday is in August (August 6th for those of you who like to give gifts), almost all of my friends are out of town around the time I celebrate my birthday. I wish I could have people tell me happy birthday in person. You know, other than my parents. In place of this, I get wall posts on my Facebook, which I guess is a good substitute. How many people would know it was my birthday if it weren’t for Facebook? I wonder that every day. Of course, with Facebook dying a slow and excruciatingly painful death, I got Twitter mentions this past summer. I expect that trend to continue. I really think Twitter’s going to become the main social network for high school students, if you don’t consider it already. I won’t say it’s not dying out eventually, because every site does. I remember saying Facebook would never die out back during my freshman year. Wow, it’s been a long time. It’s amazing how much I’ve changed. It’s no wonder I had no friends freshman year.

My favorite holiday is a tie between Christmas and New Year’s Eve. Both are at the end of the year, which of course means Winter Break for yours truly. Not only that, but during both holidays, I have an excuse to kiss someone. I haven’t taken advantage of that opportunity, but I plan to this year. Excluding the fact that Justin Bieber recently released a holiday album, I love Christmas because I love receiving gifts. Yeah, I’m selfish. Giving is overrated. There isn’t really anyone whose face lighting up would give me joy. Not anymore, at least. I never know what to buy for my close friends either. I’m actually a terrible gift giver. The result is usually gift cards because of this fact. Plus, I’m single, so it’s not like I have to go all-out with the gifts. Enough about Christmas, though. New Year’s Eve is also great. I like the promise of the coming year, even though all of them have been up-and-down. 2011 has been the absolute definition of up and down. And unless I get a girlfriend this month (it is December as I write this), the lows from past years will plague me. Counting down is also extremely fun, as is stealing a kiss from the girl next to me. Okay, I wouldn’t know about the second part, but the first part is true. Why isn’t New Year’s Eve my favorite holiday? Because of the annoying people who constantly say things like, “New Year, new me!”, or, “I’m gonna hit the gym so hard this year!”. Seriously, it’s not that hard to stay committed to work out. Not trying to sound narcissistic or anything. People always say that Thanksgiving is their favorite holiday, but honestly, I believe it’s overrated. Dinner is always amazing, but eating like a supermodel the entire day before dinner isn’t too amazing. Thanksgiving lunch is non-existent in my household. Also, why did we pick that date to give thanks to the Lord or whatever else? Shouldn’t we give thanks every day, and not on the day on which we commemorate the attempted genocide of the Native Americans? And who actually likes yams?

My least favorite “holiday” (it’s in quotes because it’s stupid) is without a doubt Valentine’s Day. Let’s completely ignore what happened in 2009, which was awful, by the way. It is the absolute worst day of the year for single people. And it’s even worse for people who have been single for their entire lives, like yours truly. I haven’t even had a single girlfriend yet. Yes, let that information wash over you. Valentine’s not only reminds me of this in a cruel, horrible manner, but I have to see the annoying couples (most of whom will split within 2 months) making out in the hallway. Get that out of here! You’re all annoying, and us singles absolutely detest all of you. Because of the incident from 2009 and my status as a lone wolf, Valentine’s is by far my least favorite “holiday”.

Christmas and New Year’s Eve, as stated, are pretty amazing, while Valentine’s Day blows. If you don’t agree, we can fight. Unless you’re considerably more muscular than me. Also, I hate Valentine’s Day. Does that count as a motif? Oh, those holidays.