It is unarguable the animosity of the commoner toward the greater population of those who lie with the same sex. The average human finds comfort in the demoralization of those who may attain a sense of flamboyance about them. The streets filled with rallying homophobes cheering “burn the gays,” at the sight of any affiliated symbol. To any homo in the general United States area, it is obvious the ostracization they endure, not to mention emotional detriment. This discrimination is not by any means their fault as it is an uncontrollable trait the “gay disease that is infecting our youth,” that is. This alienation is merely a result of uneducated and stubborn men and women who inhabit our society. My heart, however, does not agree with the greater population, and I intend to propose an aid to the livelihood of all homos alike.

I have pondered this issue for all sixteen years of my life, and just recently has the solution become apparent to me. An astounding population of 325,700,000 human beings inhabit the United States. This number includes men, women, bigots, and gays alike. Of that, only two and eight tenths percent are homosexuals, or about 9,083,558 individuals. This is a rough estimate, and does not take into account closeted homos for which I will build in a margin of about one-hundred million. This margin may seem rather small, but an overestimate would skew my calculations quite indifferently. With this margin taken into consideration, a grand total of 109,083,558 individuals must be, in fact, gay or lesbian. Provided this information, we are left with 216,616,442 heathens, and about six thousand hate crimes a year. My solution to containing those who supply the United States with such hatred is to confine them to what seems to be their homeland, the good ole’ Lone Star State. From my measurements, it can be concluded that the Texan landscape is a whopping 7,108,992,000,000 square feet. Carefully partitioning this space dimensionally into 32,800 square feet cubicles for each heterosexual individual is upward of sufficient. The average American household is only about two thousand square feet, making these proposed square living spaces economically advantageous for the average straight person. This mass emigration will be carried out completely by foot in order to reduce Government expenses. Once, said person, has arrived at their assigned cubicle they will be required to turn in any electronic device they may attain. This is strictly precautionary as we would not like any heteronormative media infiltrating our social platforms. All people confined to the living quarters will be designated forty-nine personal belongings. The number of alloted items has been approved by the board and is considered sufficient for sustainable life, since stripping someone of all accouterments would be strictly inhumane.  

    There are countless humanitarian and economic benefits to this solution I have proposed. There is a steadily increasing rate of obesity in the United States as we speak. A population strictly comprised of homosexuals would decrease this epidemic remarkably. Ninety-eight percent of all gay men and women go to the gym at least eight times a week because survival of the fittest is taken quite literally within the demographic. There would also be a net increase of at least 200% in capital gain for all companies around the country. This results from a fifty-four percent decrease in need to pay degenerate salaries! Provided that information, there will be a larger margin for infrastructurally related purchases. There are also many homosexual men and women who are currently deprived of equal opportunity in the workplace. With the complete displacement of those who acquire merely mediocre talent, but are favored for their sexual orientation, there becomes one hundred percent equal opportunity for all homosexuals! Overall, the lack of malice within the newly created society will provide for a holistic upsurge of public happiness. Many psychological studies support that even the most modest increase in employee morale directly correlates with productivity boosts. With a rapid boost in productivity there will be many new discoveries in technology and medicine, putting the United States ahead of many countries previously far superior.

Within my conclusion there is only one evident discrepancy that I could see being posed. That being, “how will reproductive success be achieved if sexual reproduction is not possible.” Although it is true, there is no plausible way through homosexual sex for a child to be conceived, there are many alternative methods. In vitro or artificial insemination treatments are becoming exceedingly more successful than natural conception.

Statistically, 39.6% of all in vitro procedures yield successful fertilization, and that number will increase exponentially as time proceeds. Natural conception is significantly less successful, only yielding gametic fertilization 15-20% of the time. It is foreseeable that many unviable solutions will be presented in place of my proposal, such as: stronger control over discriminatory media, stricter anti-discrimination laws, counselors specifically for LGBT youth in schools, or raising children to accept those not “normal” in order to remove the stigma in future generations. None of these solutions would be effective at all, and no economic boom would be experienced. They do not contain the simplistic nature coupled with astronomical success that my proposal does. I do not mean to seem pompous as I am willing to listen to any other projected ideas that may help to solve this crisis. As long as the idea cures the disgusting bigotry our country currently attains, and does so in a fashion that produces as much economic success as my proposal is projected to. Seeing as I have explored every possible solution throughout my sixteen years of life, this will be quite a feat if achieved.

No matter how remarkable the resolution I have come up with may be, I myself have no business in pushing for its mobility. Within my proposal I have provided enough detail for which my proposition’s future endeavors are clear and will ultimately be successful. I wish not to better myself through this simple procedure, I merely have the hearts of those who are affected in mind. The economical advancements, and innovative successes are an added asset that should be heavily considered before nullifying my position on this issue.

The End