Beep beep beep when I  woke there was this annoying beeping sound it was driving me insane I just wanted it to stop, my eyelids flew open letting my eyes adjust to the bright rays of light containing dust mites coming through my window. I quickly examined the room I was in this was not my bed, or my sheets, nor my room. This room was unique in its own way the walls were blue, there was the brown wooden floor, and with scratches on them, that looked about two years old. I tried to look underneath the sheets, but I was unsuccessful because stopped me, I had several needles in my arm there were cuts, burns, and bruises. I calculated the amount of time it would take someone to stop me from taking the needles out so I decided to be a rebel. I was just I about to take one out when something pressed firmly against my hand. I  tried to raise my head to see who it was touching me it was a with a grey-haired man, with bags under his eyes, he looked no more than forty, he looked bored and depressed. That’s when it hit why I was in the ER everything rushed back to me in a rush out of nowhere I was attacking my doctor I wasn’t in control of my body I was in excruciating pain the needles twisting left and right in my arm.

As a matter of fact, that didn’t stop me I shoved my doctor into the IV  reading, and the desk next to the bed. In the corn of my eye I saw my loving, adoring, tender, understanding, but insane, and compassionate family. There was something wrong there eyes were red and puffy full of regret, sorrow, confusion, and mixed with misunderstanding. They had dried up tears on their cheeks bags under their eyes like they hadn’t slept for days. At that moment I just wanted to get out of bed and comfort them and tell them that  I was okay, and not to cry. I took twenty minutes to restrain me. In the other I saw Sarah and her mom crying, saying that it was “everything is my fault”. The doctor went over to tell my family that it was common for me to react in that manner.

I tried my best to close and ignore all the voices and noise and think about the night before because I knew that would be one of the questions that will be asked. I remember my mom dropping me off at Sarah's house. The music was loud there was a group of people in a circle around something. Red, blue, and yellow lights switching back and forth on different faces, and bodies. I saw Rose and Josh swinging back and forth making gooey eyes at each other. I remember why I came to tell my boyfriend who is about to be my ex that we were done. I couldn’t take his bipolar illness, abusiveness, abuse, and drug abuse. I finally found him in a big group of guys as I embarked his presence I thought of how I would tell him without getting hurt. He looked horrible he had on some blues jeans with dirt stains on them, a navy blue t-shirt with holes in it, and some beat up old Adidas. He finally met my eye and started screaming my name he kissed me viciously. I tried to resist because his breath smelled like Cigarettes, Marijuana, and Vodka. I wanted to tell him that his breath was repugnant and that he needed five packs of Mentos, but I  didn’t want to get hit in front of everyone. I didn't want anyone to know the inside in my relationship, so I kept my mouth shut.

  I was just about to tell him that I didn't want to be with him when he started to complain about his stomach, he started trembling, his eyes were rolling into the back of his head. One thing I knew about this boy was that he was a great actor, and trickster so I didn’t want to believe it. He did also take shots of heroin. I was in the middle of a decision to be cruel and let him suffer and die or to call the police which will lead to my best friend to get into trouble. So I took him upstairs to Sarah's room.