I woke up on a rainy Tuesday morning. Usually, I have a hard time waking up in the morning but this morning in particular, I was eager to wake up. There was a two hour delay for school, because of the weather. Usually, I’d just sleep in if there was a delay,  but I had something to look forward to that one grey, gloomy morning. I was invited out for coffee by someone very important to me. I was hesitant on answering him because up until that point, we hadn’t spoken to each other in over two years.

I lied to my mom and said I was meeting someone to work on a project for school. I had a feeling that she’d be disappointed if I told her who I was meeting. Part of me didn’t want to go because I didn’t think it’d be a good idea for me. I decided to go anyway because my heart felt like it was the right move to make. What’s the worst that could happen?  was one of the many thoughts running through my mind. I arrived at the coffee shop before he did. I ordered my coffee and sat down. From that point on, my anxiety wafted through the roof.

Minutes passed by, and I started to think he wasn’t going to show. The old him would’ve done that. I began listening to music to drown out my thoughts. A few moments later, he showed up. When I saw him, it felt like butterflies flew in my stomach and my heart raced a mile a minute. Those feelings haven’t appeared since the day I first met him. He was  in line waiting to order his coffee while I sat in my chair trying to put myself together to even say “hi” to him. He proceeded to make his way to the table while I sat and before I knew it, we were sitting across from each other. I wanted to say something in that moment but I realized I was just staring at him. He didn’t notice because he was taking his schoolwork out of his backpack.

He looked much different from the last time I saw him; I should’ve expected that. It had been years since the last time I was even five feet from him, let alone sitting across from him. I noticed everything new about him, from his new hairstyle, him not having braces anymore, and the difference in his voice. So much had changed appearance wise since the last time I spoke to him. I hope his personality did as well. He looked up and I became lost in his mesmerizing, big brown eyes. Before I met him, brown eyes were just brown eyes. Then I fell in love with someone who had brown eyes and it changed my whole perspective on a simple eye color.

I eventually found the courage to say “hi” to him. He smiled and said it back. I knew he was busy doing school work, but I was so eager to have a conversation with him. I had so many unanswered questions for him, but it wasn’t my time to ask therefore; I didn't. Instead, we talked like we used to, before everything happened. Some topics were hard for him to discuss. I could feel his leg shaking a mile a minute; he never knew that. He seemed anxious, which is a side of him I’d never seen before. We started talking about the simple topics like school and sports. He asked me where I wanted to see myself in ten years.

He had never asked me a question like that one. I proceeded to tell him my plan and where I wanted to see myself. In return, I asked him the same question. That’s when I noticed a change in him I had never seen. He answered my question and seemed to have his life figured out but I could tell something was bothering him. To this day I regret not asking the question I wanted to ask. It wasn’t my time. Maybe that time will come when I least expect it. He’s always been the type of guy that answered everything confidently. It was definitely weird seeing him react to that one question that morning. Following that question, he apologized. I’ve been waiting to hear him apologize for over two years. Those two little words changed my outlook on the situation that ruined us and what we had.

Each word he said meant more to me than the last, and if I’m being honest I could’ve cried. Hearing him say he was sorry for everything and him saying he wishes he could turn back time to fix it. That lifted a weight off my shoulders; I let go of the grudge I was holding onto for years.In that moment  I realized holding on could hurt more than letting go. I didn’t think I’d be able to come back from what he put me through. I learned something from the person who hurt me so badly; time does heal wounds and that sometimes it takes someone to see the bad in people to see the good. It was reassuring to know he wasn’t the only one affected by how things ended.

That one grey morning is one I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget. For years I thought me being in his life didn’t affect him, and I always thought he was going to be the bad guy that he was in our relationship. I’m so happy I was wrong. He’s someone that impacted my life in  more ways than one. Words simply can’t describe it. We both learned so much from each other. We both lost ourselves and us being friends while we try to find ourselves again is something I’m very grateful for. He’s someone I won’t ever forget, and as much as we hurt each other, it made our friendship stronger. I guess it just took us losing each other to realize it. I’ll forever be grateful for that talk we had in that coffee shop that rainy morning.  Here’s to a beautiful new beginning.