Entering the room, full of smoke, white and cloudy; barley see the people in there. The smell of skunk, and all the guys laughing, with their eyes red, almost closing.

As I was raised around pure boys and no girls I can see that it have affected me in a positive/negative way. The negatives are my brother is in gangs, drugs,gets high every day at my house, which his room is right across mine. When I’m doing my homework or just around my room I always get the smell of weed (marijuana) because I already know they’re hot boxing the room; full of smoke. I hear those loud laughs in the middle of the night. My one and only brother thats the oldest, only 4 years older than me. Can’t see why he does all this. Instead of showing us bad influence, he should show us the best. I’m not saying exactly me because I’m 15 years old and know that it’s bad and that if i follow the same path as him I will see the consequences. I only say it because of my 3 little brothers that are only 3,6,7 doesn’t he just get it.?! They see all of these bad influences and are going to start thinking its a right thing to do.

I’m thinking my brother Jose is this way, for the fact that we are raised by a single mom, and always have been. Me and Jose were raised by a teen mom. My beautiful, caring and loving mom is always stressed,crying,worried for my brother. I hate those days when i see my mom depressed; it makes me feel the same. When i close my eyes I can hear the sirens of a cop and screaming/crying! WEEKENDS- don’t like them much, more than 99% that were going to get a call at 1:00 am that my brother is at the police station, for the fact that he was tagging, in a drive by, pulled over caught with drugs etc.

The positives are that I look up to him and I tell myself, “I don’t want to follow the same path, or I will end up the same or maybe even worst”. I can see my brother has no future; I will and never going to stop trying to help him out! another positive is that I know I’m strong for the fact that I have been through it all for now 11 years.

I just don’t see how I am way BIG difference to him. I’m nothing like him, I’m not in gangs or do anything like him. It’s maybe because I have seen to where I can get if I were to be like my brother. I pray to god my brother Jose realizes he’s doing the worst and stops all this gang related stuff, and drama. Also for my 3 little brothers to think just like me, and not look up to my brother. ONE DAYY HE WILL REALIZE IT AFTER HE READS THIS....