Have you ever been lost and thought that you couldn’t understand what was going on around you? Have you ever been in that situation where you don’t even have the strength to get out of bed just because you knew your day is going to be the same as any other one? Have you ever experienced the feelings that would make you sleepless in the middle of the night and your tears wouldn’t stop running down your face? Have you? I know I have…

It is like you are in a little box. You are surrounded by it and all you see are those four walls over and over again. There is no door, there is no key, not even a crack but just darkness. That little box is my little world that I once created for myself to get lost in thoughts. At first, it looks like the most calming and relaxing place you could find, but after a while it turns into a messy maze where you cannot find any way out unless someone throws a bright light and guides you the way. I want to tell you how I found that light.

At first, it all started as a simple feeling of sadness. I thought that it was the most normal thing someone can experience in some part of their life, but then things got worse. I started seeing and feeling sadness even in the things I enjoyed, found funny, and relaxing. I lost interest in almost everything but there was only one thing I was passionate about, pain. I got to like it and became dependent on it. Everything was getting worse and worse, and I wouldn’t even tell my closest friends about this. All the fake smiles and jokes would help me hide it easily, that’s why most of the people wouldn’t notice anything being wrong.

One casual day one of my best friends comes and sits beside me, with a pale look on her face.

“I know everything,” she calmly said.

“What are you talking about?” I respond, acting surprised and trying to laugh it off.

She just became more serious.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked again, this time more sadly than calmly.

“I really don’t know what you are talking about,” I tried to avoid it again.

She slowly looks at my arms and then hers.

“I am the same…” she says.

Without knowing what to do or say we both start crying, and lucky for both of us we found out and found each other.

“You know there are a lot of people like us,” she added.

As time passed I found more and more people going through this phase and one thing that helped me the most was being friends with them and talking about things that we would both understand. It was like, more and more people were coming with me into my small little box and every time someone new or a friend would come in the box, it would start to crack open until one day I saw that forgotten light again.

My friends would never leave my side and I would never leave theirs and even today we still are like that. From this experience, I think that I have learned something; even though life can put you through difficulties, the most important thing is to not bow before them and just give up without trying. The best thing to do is to understand instead of being victimized by it because everyone, in a specific period of their life, passes through this. Everyone has moments that they feel down and they think they are nothing. I want to say just one thing. Before proving anyone wrong, firstly prove it to yourself that you are worth it and you deserve everything. That’s what makes you feel better.