Monday, July 9th 2018 was, as I like to call it, “The day that changed it all”. Would you believe me if I said one of the most important days of my life was one where I missed everything? I had missed the auditions to my summer theatre camp, and panic was about to ensue. As I heard the words leave my dad’s lips I nearly felt my heart plummet and my legs collapse. How could I have missed the first day? The rehearsals were supposed to start the week after, but alas, a phone call from the Stoneham Theater asking where I was resulted in me accepting my fate. I calmed down, and thought that it didn’t even matter. I wasn’t gonna get a good part, or make new friends, or do well for my first show. These thoughts rampaged through my mind, but little did I know that the summer of 2018 would change it all. Theater may appear to be another mundane extracurricular activity, but it’s the catalyst that allowed me to become the person I am today.

       Before I began theatre, I was an exceptionally timid child. I had no friends and only spent time with one person, myself. As a child, I was very imaginative and creative, but only when I was alone. I made up games with imaginary friends and pretended I was a secret spy agent or a superhero on a mission. But when it came to socializing with others, I wasn’t comfortable enough to open up to them. This is why I wasn’t ecstatic about being stuck for six hours a day, five days a week, in a theatre camp for kids.  I felt getting along with others would be a struggle for me.

       After my missed audition, I reluctantly had to go the next day for callbacks. This is where the director would like to see an actor again, perhaps to hear them read from the script or see them next to another actor. The morning of, I reluctantly got ready and was driven to Stoneham Central Middle School. Stepping out of the car and pondering the mammoth of a day that sat before me, I took a deep breath and went into the belly of the beast. Once I was in the school, a director escorted me to the gymnasium, where all the kids were. Standing in the door frame of the gymnasium, I observed the groups of people in the distance. Some were standing around, others were chit-chatting with friends, and a few people were sitting in the bleachers. The director told me I could go sit in the bleachers. I walked over, put my stuff down, and waited; noticing how I was out of place. Everyone was radiating confidence and happiness, which made me feel quite meek. We did warmups and cycled through different activities like acting, singing, and dancing. My internal thoughts carried throughout me for the whole day; I could just feel that I stuck out like a sore thumb. I was alone at lunch, and didn’t have anyone to talk to for the remaining workshops we had left. I expected it, but was still dismayed. 

       The following days were about announcing the cast list and meeting our fellow cast members. Although, over time, I began to notice something. These people were quite different from my peers at school. They were silly and random but could still snap into action at any given time. Sounds of laughter would swiftly transition into dazzling dance moves and vivacious vibrato. I was inspired and slowly became more and more comfortable with my fellow actors. People started talking to me and I was able to talk back! This was how I met some of my theater best friends. While playing an improv game, we were put together in a scene, and within seconds just clicked with one another and came up with wild jokes like a king obsessed with only artificial cheese. We loved it so much that we performed it for our weekly show and tell. I felt like I could finally be myself with others by cracking jokes, being weird, and having so much fun! Also, doing something I had genuine passion for was much better than an extracurricular activity forced upon me. 

       Our show itself taught me many lessons as well. In Shrek: The Musical, the theme is to be yourself no matter what. Besides acting skills, what I learned was that I can be unapologetically myself, and it’s not my fault if others can’t accept that. This was one of my ultimate goals, and though it took a while, I did reach it. I had the realization that doing everything for others and trying to impress them wouldn’t help me with finding myself. Hiding my true self would not be beneficial to me, so I learned how to truly be me. I learned how fun theatre could be and that I should always “Let my freak flag wave!”. The feeling of being welcomed into a group with open arms was wondrous. Without a doubt, that was the greatest summer of my life. The theatre camp may have only lasted six weeks, but it was enough to change my view on life forever. I felt ready for anything coming my way and knew I had a voice I could use.

       Looking back on how I’ve grown as a person in just a few years is a strange thought. The memories of group-project stress and standing motionless in a crowded lunchroom with no open seats seem so far away. I started this journey by never wanting to continue, and it’s interesting to ponder what my life would have been like without theatre. Theatre opened up the doors to tons of new possibilities. The courage it gave me is what prompted me to try new things and be more adventurous. This experience taught me that sometimes being imperfect is just perfect for me, “What makes us special makes us strong!” I have found my voice and now I’m not afraid of raising it!