Dear dad, you're not my father. You never have been. Only biologically am I linked to you. I honestly wish I wasn't. 

A four year old girl should not have to feel like she has been replaced by a bottle of liquor. A five year old girl should not have to migrate to her fathers house on weekends, only to be neglected. A six year old girl should not have to fear her father’s booming voice after he's had one too many drinks. A seven year old girl should not have to see her “father” behind bars. 

A now 15 year old girl is still very angry. How was it possible that the man I once trusted, the man that was supposed to teach me how to ride a bike, or take me fishing, turned into a monster in the blink of an eye? Not the kind of monster that hides under your bed or the kind that only appears as you flick the lights off, but worse. The kind that lurks in plain sight. 

My mother always warned me about strange men, yet I never would have thought that it would be the one living under the same roof as myself, that would harm me the most. His actions were so despicable, I can hardly speak of them without being filled with disgust, rage, and sorrow. I partly blame alcohol for what happened, maybe if it wasn't in the picture, this wouldn't have happened. But my fathers always been a monster, I can't ignore it, and neither can he.