I was truly taken with the sky, especially at night. The stars, fiery emblems that reigned mighty up above, calmed me when nothing else could. Friends may have come and gone, grades may not have been up to par, and disappointment may have hung in the air, but the stars would remain. Even the moon was a chartable un-constant in my life, beautiful though it was. When I failed to fulfill the burden of my ambition, the night sky would console me. Even with nothing else, I still had the stars and their glow to both metaphorically and literally light up the darkness. I believed that the stars existed to watch over me and protect me in times of need - a bit ego centrist sure, but a child’s dream. Over the next few years of my life, I would come to cherish their protective gleam even more deeply.

     Yet, even the stars could not lighten every darkness of my life. When I was hospitalized at the age of 12 for an inability to walk, I could not see the stars. I was kept inside, locked away from the best medicine that money did not even have to buy. I was kept from my protectors. The view from the hospital window revealed that the light pollution of the surrounding buildings blurred out the ethereal faint glow from the sky. The stars were gone, and they were not coming back. I was 12 not two, so I understood that the stars were largely unchanging, and it was infantile to believe they had left me for some unexplainable reason. But I believed it anyways, and I wanted them to return. Where did they go?

     I worked hard on my recovery, pushing my body to heal quickly so that I could see the stars again and, hopefully, do so on my own two feet. I thought to myself that if I recovered, maybe, just maybe, they would be proud of me- lifeless, balls of fire that they were. But even after my body regained its strength, I was not rewarded with their return. I was kept inside once again by the confines of homework and expectations, hidden away from the sky I loved; glances through the window were just never enough. I dedicated myself to school and extracurricular activities- debate, model UN, hoping to become someone worthy of admiring the most heavenly bodies I believed existed. I thought I could pave the way for their return. In doing so, I had not realized I lost the time to admire them at all. Even after they “returned” so to speak, and I did look at the sky, I could not really see the stars in the same manner as before. They seemed distant and disappointed now. So, I kept working.

     The more I worked, the dimmer the stars became. I did not understand why. I soul-searched to try and understand what was happening. Was I hallucinating? Why could I not see them as before? Where did the stars go? My intense self- reflections often yielded empty thoughts. I sadly remained this way for a prolonged period of time, well past my high-school graduation and the culmination of all my efforts of school- until I came to Vanderbilt.

     At college, I met some of the brightest and most diverse people I could imagine. I met students from around the world and grew to appreciate people in a way I did not think possible. Every conversation was intriguing and even if sometimes confusing, always left me wanting more. My intellectual curiosity was stimulated to the point where I could not help but become fascinated with individuals the way I was with the stars. Then, when I looked at the night sky- though it was obviously and thoroughly jaded by Nashville light pollution- I saw the stars shine brighter than ever before.  

      My whole life, I had an arbitrary perception of the world and my place in it. I based my value off achievements, silently wishing they would earn me the praise of those around me and even of the stars. I failed to understand the importance of inter-human connection but once I finally did, noticed how every little piece of the world shone brighter than ever before. Where did all the stars go? Nowhere, they were right there all along. With the bonds I build in company of those around me, I have faith that the stars and people I love will watch over me wherever I go. My faith has earned me the right to appreciate the entities I cherish.