I’ve been thinking about how grateful I am to have such a perfect friend. I sometimes take my situation for granted- some people spend a lifetime trying to find their person, but i’ve already found mine. Everything about her makes me smile, and I love the way she can read my mind. Recently I cant help but think of her floating through the crisp fall air in North Carolina. She keeps asking me to come up to see her hidden away in her house in the mountains for the summer, but my stubborn mind keeps me thinking that summer equals sunburns and boat days. Still I can’t help but to imagine how much hell we could break loose in the mountains- how scandalous is watching Glee all afternoon?

She sees the world through so many colors, the bright and dark, and it feels likes she’s constantly teaching me how to make things better, or funnier, or less self deprecating.

Being friends with her is makes me feel sad for everyone who will never get the chance to know her. There are moments when i’m talking to her where i blurt out something about me I didn’t even know was true. It’s like she brings out every single part of me.  The more I hang out with her the more my personality starts to build up. It’s like she’s helping me find pieces of myself I never even knew I had. Maybe I wasn’t even a fully formed human before I met her. I don’t think I could have survived if I was. I’m too codependent.

I used to think that if someone saw me deep down inside they wouldn’t want me anymore, but here I am. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to share myself with anyone as fully as I have with her. When I’m with someone else I catch myself saying things I know she would laugh at or holding back the unfiltered thoughts wrecking havoc in my head. Nothing can compare to our Ramen outings, movie dates, or lazy beach days. Being with her feels like one of those moments that feels just as good as the idea of it.

Finally sharing all the parts of myself- no matter how thorny or shameful- makes me feel like the Minions are singing in my heart *cue laughter*. Because even though we are both so weird, almost to the point of being unlovable, at least we understand each other in a way we will never understand anyone else. 

I wish I could somehow bottle all the moments I spend with her and store them in some top secret part of my brain for when i’m feeling lonely or sad. Or for when i’m gathered around the campfire telling stories about the good ol days. I’m making sure to paint her portrait with the coolest colors so I can capture the glow she seem to always radiate. I’ll make sure to display the finished product in the middle of nowhere, maybe hidden in the red and orange leaves, just for me.