Last night I encountered the most disgusting, terrible creature in the world: a cockroach. It was horrifying, and I didnt know what to do. I was simply minding my business, and wiping frustrated tears from my eyes after dealing with two dreadful hours of chemistry homework, when I looked up at my ceiling and saw it. It scurried down my wall, and it took everything in me not to scream like I was being murdered. I doubt my parents would enjoy me waking them up with wild eyes acting as if there was a family annihilator in our home. So instead I tried to keep calm and remember my Florida training. When I was younger my mom would always tell me to grab the shoe closest in proximity and completely end the bug’s life as quickly as possible. So I did just that. Kind of. First, I started recording myself. Then I grabbed the shoe closest to me and started hitting blindly. To the unsuspecting eye- and I mean my neighbors who were playing beer pong on their patio- I must have looked like I was trapped in a terrible performance piece. Not even. I became a cartoon character- my arms were flying everywhere and my legs were moving so fast they were borderline invisible. At least that's what it felt like. On camera I looked like a fish jumping and gasping for air. Every single time I thought it was dead I was quickly proven wrong. I didn't even know cockroaches could fly until that fateful night. I turned into a madman and hit the poor thing at least a hundred times. I don't really care though. I'm considering turning the video into a horror film.