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Always
I watch you walk by everyday, I open my mouth and get stuck on the very first sound. You just keep going by, and you never saw me. Never even cared enough to notice I want you.
Now I’m trapped and I can’t breathe, it feels like on knives. My friends ask me if I’m okay, I always say I’m fine. But even that little white lie makes me feel like I’m lying to the world.
I see you as I walk in, knees weak and shaking, stomach doing flips. The nausea begins. You just keep talking to your friends , not bothering to say hello, making me feel like I’m worth nothing.
You’ve caught my fire that burns though my soul, never truly noticing you have it. But always making it flicker and almost go out. Always ignoring me, never caring to notice me.
I always hope things will change, that one day you’ll happen to glance towards me and be the one to blush and quickly look. It must be my fault, though; I haven’t done anything to try to show you how I feel.
I sit here and curse the guilty hands of hope for ever letting me think I have a chance, to let me think that someday you’ll notice me and want me too. But I guess things will never change and life will always be the same.