Every crack in my voice, every pimple on my face, every strand of hair that wasn't in perfect position, none of it is good enough for you. But silly me, nothing about who I am is good enough for you. You, perfect in your eyes, try to break me down on a daily basis. Why stop, though? It worked so well when we were kids. Every single time you made me scream, shout, shut down, or cry brought a smile to your face, and I knew it. You have always wanted to destroy every little bit of confidence I had. Always reminding me that I was never good enough, and never would be, but I have news for you. I found me.

I have searched down deep. Every tear that was never good enough has went away. I started spending every minute that was once used for cutting and crying by studying who I am. I looked into mirrors, physically, spiritually, and emotionally, and boy, was I surprised by what I found. It turned out that only one thing you said to was almost true. We were only ten years old when you said it, but I will never forget that day. We were playing on the blacktop when you pushed me down to the ground, spit on my face, and told me I would never be better than anyone. That is the only thing I sort of hold true today. I guess you want me to explain, so here goes nothing. I, as I stand before you, will never be better than the person I judge myself by, but the person I judge myself in is by no means better than me.

You see, the only time I judge myself is when I look at the man in the mirror. I will never be able to do anything better than him, but never can he do a job better than I can. He is perfect of being himself, and so am I, for I am a unique individual. Who I see in the mirror will never be who you see when you stare into yours. I will always be good enough for me, regardless of if you accept the fact or not. It now seems that your opinion does not matter to me, and rightfully so.

As I stared into my mirror, I redefined success. I realized that as long as I was able to look into the mirror every night and tell everyone who I saw in that moment that I was proud of what I had done that day, then I had just finished a successful day. I found this out with none of your help, disproving your theory that nothing I would ever do in life would be successful. After redefining success, I sought out to be more of it. What started out as short sentences and paragraphs, stained with the same tears that continuously streamed down my face transformed into novels and novellas, teeming with emotion completely captured by my number two pencil. I then worked up the courage to show not only family and friends, but the whole world by publishing it online. With that, I debunked your myth that no one would ever like anything I made.

I hope you are starting to notice how wrong you were about me. I know you will be able to because ever I, as ignorant as you boasted I was, discovered this. It clearly must not be a difficult concept to grasp, so I suggest you learn it. I hope you don't find it too hard to digest.

Do not take this as a letter of hate to you, but by all means a thank you not. Before I met you, I spent my time playing and reading, but after that dark day in my life, which turned out to only for shadow our future together, I spent all my time locked away in my room, inflicting self harm on my wrists and cried. But if it wasn't for that shift of time, I might not have discovered these truths about myself. I might not have been capable of being this happy if it was not for you making me so depressed, and for that, I thank you. I just hope that you can funds yourself as successful as I find myself, but please don't judge yourself based upon me. Oh, and one more thing. Remember that I will always love you.

Rest in Peace, Tyler.