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Battle Scars
The sound of gunfire surrounds the battlefield as I continue a six year war with the enemy. They continue to supply themselves, recruit men, and actively train them to be stronger each and every day, as my best men were being captured and kept as prisoners of war, my weapons started to rust and I was practically vulnerable. Their ultimate goal: defeat.
Then, four years on, as I started looking strategies to fight these battles, I found a bunker and I thought I was going to stay there forever and the war would be over. As time progressed, the enemy found me and started banging and bombing the door, trying to get me out to continue fighting. I thought I was going to be safe, but I refused to drop my weapon and made my men keep watch because I knew that the threat was imminent. I was distracted from everything that I had inside, rather focusing on what was happening on the outside. The thought that I had to go find a new place to stay occupied my mind, but nowhere was, as I thought, as safe as this one. The others had planes and more advanced weaponry that could have evacuated my crew and ultimately saved me from this, but I refused.
One day, I realized that the enemy was stronger than ever before and was only getting better, while I was unconsciously getting weaker. I had no choice to leave the bunker to end this war once and for all, hoping to return one day, but I knew I had to fight or they would win. As they got stronger, I was on the verge of defeat. Out on the battlefield, dying and alone, I realized that the bunker that I hid in for almost 18 months was gone. I was left out to fight and I was scared. I continued to hope that an ally would drop weapons on my base so I can win, if not I had no other choice but to wave the white flag in surrender.
There is no medical assistance and my men are continually getting sick and dying, waiting until the wartime nurse arrives. Things started to turn from bad to worse. I have constantly lived in fear of recruiting a Trojan horse from the enemy so I don't allow new recruits, no matter how strong they may be. Men died every day and things got continually worse. Each day held a new challenge to fight and all hope sense of hope was starting to diminish, but who knows, I may win.
So, this isn't actually a war story, well I guess it is in a way. This is the story of dealing with demons, mental health challenges, it is a battle that I fight all day every day. The bunker, the safe comfort that I could only feel from one person, the thing I would literally give anything for, the person who introduced me to Cupid, the God of love, and made me feel brave and loved.
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War is difficult and no one leaves without some type of scar.