"You just need to hear this and if you want me to be out of your life forever, I'll understand. Nothing was ever a lie for me. The way I felt about you was never a lie and it never will be a lie. It won't mean anything to you and that's fine but it means everything to me knowing that after everything you've put me through, because you know it's a lot, I'm still able to feel the same way I always have about you. I always thought that made me so weak because you even told me I was weak. But looking back, and even now I know I would've done absolutely anything for you and I think being able to put someone else before yourself is such a strong quality. I went into this relationship knowing that you would break my heart and I even told you that anyway, yet I still took the risk because I knew you were worth any heartbreak. You can say I'm selfish, not good enough, and fat or ugly, and everything else you've called me so far. But I have never stopped caring about you and I know you know it, too. You say I wasn't there for you, but you never came to be about anything and I wanted so badly to be there for you through anything. I accepted absolutely any flaw you had and it made me love you even more. It's so rare to find people who can care about someone so much and if you really want me out of your life, I just want you to think about that. Here or not, it won't make me stop caring about you. I'm in love with you and doing so has screwed me over and ruined so much for me but I don't even care because I know that what ever I go through is completely worth any suffering if it means that you're able to be happy. I don't care what your response to any of this will be and I can't imagine it being anything good but you deserve to know how I feel. You know there is nothing I'd want more than to just be with you again because you were the world to me. You have put me through a load of torture which you've even admitted to putting me through so you know how bad it is. And if you decide you want me out of your life forever with no contact at all, I'll accept your choice even if you do have something to say about me here and there. But at least this way you'll know that even if I'm not in your life, you will always have someone who cares about you more than you can imagine and I think that's something to be extremely grateful for knowing: there is someone who would do anything for you. If you can't see it now, I promise you that one day you'll see just how much I did for you. I've made a few mistakes, but I'm not the only one. There is no bad guy here and I'd never try to make you look bad. But there is so much you have to see and understand because nothing kills me more than the fact that you said I mentally crushed you. But if you understood how I was feeling, I assure you, you wouldn't feel crushed; at least not for the reasons that you do. I am in no way asking for any chance or for you to change your mind. But I am asking that if you decide to have nothing to do with me for actual good, that you at least try to understand things from my side as well and understand how hurt I was when I lost you. Because I'm crushed too, but each day I'm trying to be stronger. I'm trying to fix myself. I want you to be able to do the same and not feel crushed all while knowing that I will always be here even if you don't want me to, because I do care and love you. You know I never open up but I am literally pouring my heart out to you right now and it's probably the hardest thing I've ever done. No matter what you choose to believe, and no matter what you've put me through, I always cared about you and still do."

"Please leave me alone."