Being around friends has a vibe that cannot be demonstrated or explained. Over the past year I have lost friends and made new ones, just like any other human being would. It isn’t hard to tell which friends are true or not, a true friend is someone you want to tell every teenage version of a tragic event to, even in the darkest of times. I struggled this year with fitting into the wrong crowd and letting others influence my actions and thoughts.

To start, I have had the same “squad” pretty much my entire life. Over Christmas break I was pushed out of the group for different reasons, the reasons they used seemed more like excuses to get rid of me. Nobody should ever have to know what that feels like. I have always been one of the more popular girls and I don’t let others see the weak side of me so I decided to fake a smile and pretend everything was okay. Some girls I associate with from another school made me feel accepted. Those kids I began hanging out with do not have rules and their parents let them do whatever they want with no consequences. The funny thing is, I actually thought I could fit in with them. Maybe the “new me” did, but not the “kind, sweet, loving me.” I was not being myself and my parents noticed, they cut me off from all social media and hanging out. Never thought I would say this, but that was the best month out of this whole year. I found myself again and I started becoming the person I have always strived to be.

Next, about a month ago my old group began reaching out to me, trying to hangout and communicate more. Despite how hurt I was, I knew deep down in my heart that they were the kind of people I wanted to be around and they were people who inspired me to be better than my best. Each and every one of them gives off vibrant smiles on a daily basis. The inside jokes and ridiculous memories I share with those girls will never be forgotten and will always overpower the negative.

Third, everything that has happened involving friends over the past year has made me think of who I want to be as a person. The reflection I have made on myself ended up being better than it had started off as. Taking a break from my regular group of friends made me realize we can never be the same as we used to, but we can be better. I was so lost for a few months but when my friends reached out, everything came together like glue. My schoolwork started improving, I was exceeding in dance, and I noticed myself becoming a better person. Many middle school kids think having a lot of friends makes you cool or seem better than everyone, I know this because I used to think like that. Now, I realize when my parents told me life should always be quality over quantity, they were exactly right. Our group has reunited and we are back stronger and better than ever.
In conclusion, never change for people just so you can fit in. Stick with the friends that make you feel at home each and everyday. Live life to the fullest.