The lights are on and the curtains are closed. We start just outside the school, on a Wednesday morning. Here, Robin, the StuCo president, enters the stage with a megaphone in his hand. He puts the bullhorn into his mouth to make an announcement. 

ROBIN 

Attention, students! If you’re interested in going to prom this Saturday night, tickets are available for purchase now! It’ll be this Saturday at 7:30 PM at the Quail Ridge Lodge! More information will be on our school website! Be sure to buy your tickets before they sell out and don’t miss out on the fun! 

Robin leaves on the other side of the stage, while Michelle enters the stage. 

MICHELLE 

(sarcastically) Fun at a prom? Yeah right, that’ll never happen! 

Jimmy enters the stage. 

JIMMY 

(excitedly) Hey, Michelle! 

MICHELLE 

Hi, Jimmy. What’s going on? 

JIMMY 

Are you excited for our senior prom? 

MICHELLE 

(sarcastically) Yeah, I’m ecstatic. 

JIMMY 

How about I add to your excitement by taking you as my date? 

MICHELLE 

Let’s make this clear, Jimmy. You’ve been asking me out since seventh grade. And every time you ask me, I always say no. I don’t do school dances, including prom, so what makes you think I’m gonna say yes this time? 

JIMMY 

You never know what the response will be. 

MICHELLE
I do. And my answer is no. 

Michelle begins to hurry towards the end of the stage. Jimmy tries to catch up with her. 

JIMMY 

(slightly bemused) Come on, now. Can’t you just make an exception this time? It’s our senior year and we should make the most of it! 

Michelle stops and turns towards Jimmy. 

MICHELLE 

Maybe I will if you think of something different and creative. 

Both exit the stage. 

The curtains open to reveal a cafeteria. Here, we can have tables or desks to make lunch tables. Jeremy & Syd are sitting on one of the tables. They’re laughing uncontrollably while telling each other ridiculous jokes. Jimmy enters and sits next to them. 

JEREMY & SYD 

(exclaims) Jimmy! 

JIMMY 

Hey, bros. 

JEREMY 

So, did she finally accept your offer to go out with you? 

JIMMY 

No, she didn’t. 

Jeremy then breaks into laughter. 

JEREMY 

Did you hear that, Syd? Jimmy asked Michelle out to prom AGAIN. And she still said no. 

SYD 

I heard, Jeremy. So, what did she tell you exactly, Jimmy? 

JIMMY 

She said that she will think about it if I come up with something different and creative. Any ideas? 

JEREMY 

I have the perfect idea! Why don’t you swim to New York, break into the Empire State Building, get Metallica to perform a private concert, wear a tuxedo T shirt, & sing a song to Michelle about why she should go with you to prom? 

JIMMY 

We’re in Missouri! How would I swim to New York, idiot? 

JEREMY 

You become a fish, obviously. You’re the expert athlete. And since you’re a senior, make yourself a legend. 

JIMMY 

(confused) I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that. 

SYD 

Maybe you should go bungee jumping into the Villarrica Volcano and film yourself doing it?

Jimmy looks at Syd like he’s crazy. 

JIMMY 

What is a Dillcario? 

SYD 

It’s Villarrica and it’s the most thrilling bungee jumping site in Chile. You jump into a volcano, but you won’t feel any kind of heat at all! 

JIMMY 

Are you trying to kill me or something? 

SYD 

No way, bro. It’s Chile, so it’s gonna be cold. 

JEREMY 

Yes siree. 

Jimmy then leaves to head to class, obviously confused. Jeremy & Syd continue to come up with stupid ideas and laugh hysterically while they take their time to leave the stage. It is here that the lights will fade out. 

The lights fade back in to reveal a hallway. Here, Michelle, and her friends, Jenna, Aubrey, & Sadie, enter from one side of the stage. They are walking over to their next class. 

JENNA 

Come on, Michelle. Are you gonna turn down Jimmy’s offers any longer? 

MICHELLE 

I’m telling you, Jenna. We have completely different personalities and interests. He’s an extrovert, totally obsessed with sports and partying; and you know that I’d prefer binge watching the Discovery Channel and taking quiet road trips. 

SADIE 

Well, because of that, you never showed up for homecoming, senior sunrise, sporting events, or the winter formal. 

AUBREY 

Besides, no couple has to have everything in common. You know they say opposites attract. 

MICHELLE 

Maybe, but in any case, you know that I feel like prom is overrated! We have to pick the perfect dress, have the perfect hair and makeup, for a few minutes of forced pictures…we never use any of those again and it’s so not my scene. 

AUBREY 

Well, what else would you prefer doing if you were out on a date? 

SADIE 

And don’t say saving the Albino Skunks again! 

MICHELLE 

You know how important saving endangered animals is to me, Sadie. They’re practically extinct! It certainly doesn’t help that they live in Alaska and have to endure the bitter cold. 

SADIE 

Just what would your ideal date setting look like then? 

MICHELLE 

If it’s not saving extinct animals, then probably road trips, especially driving across state. 

AUBREY 

Come on, Michelle! Can’t it be something more exciting? 

MICHELLE 

Like what, Aubrey? 

AUBREY 

Kayaking, maybe? 

Aubrey then signals Sadie & Jenna to pretend they’re rowing a boat and do it in front of Michelle…literally. 

MICHELLE 

What if I drown? 

JENNA 

That’s why swimming lessons exist. 

SADIE 

I’ve got it! Why not fly across the world? Aubrey has a private jet you can take! 

Sadie, Aubrey, & Jenna then pretend to fly in an airplane. 

MICHELLE 

But I hate flying and I’m scared of heights. 

Aubrey & Sadie become visibly annoyed and groan in frustration. 

JENNA 

Dates don’t always have to be big and flashy. It can also be very simple. What about a simple dinner out? Spaghetti & Meatballs, perhaps? You like those. 

Aubrey & Sadie then pretend to have that to eat, while Michelle is visibly unimpressed. 

MICHELLE 

I’m restricted to a one month diet and I’m only two weeks into progress. I can’t break that streak. 

JENNA 

Well, who knows? Maybe there’s a boy out there who’s right for you. I’m just saying maybe you should think about it and maybe give him a chance. 

Mr. Waters enters like he’s a hall monitor and sees the four girls still talking and not moving. 

MR. WATERS 

Hey ladies, I get you four have something to talk about, but please head over to your classes, thank you very much. 

SADIE 

(frustrated) I always hate being rushed to do anything. 

Jenna, Michelle, Sadie, & Aubrey head over to the other side of the stage. 

MR. WATERS 

I don’t want any of you to be late to your classes. 

Mr. Waters leaves the stage. 

At this point, the curtain closes, while Michelle and Jimmy enter. They are both ready to head home. Michelle walks normally, heading to her car, while Jimmy runs over to catch up with her. 

MICHELLE 

(Looking offstage, as if she’s talking to her friends) 

Ok, I gotta run and finish up my homework. See you next time! 

Jimmy eventually catches up with Michelle. 

JIMMY 

Michelle, wait up! 

MICHELLE 

(sarcastically) Oh. Hey, Jimmy. 

JIMMY 

Hi, Michelle. Mr. Waters’s history lesson was very interesting, wasn’t it? 

MICHELLE 

It was. But I’m gonna guess that’s not what you came to tell me. 

JIMMY 

Yes. You like road trips, right? 

MICHELLE 

Yes. You of all football jocks know me the best. 

JIMMY 

Well, I was thinking about what you said earlier and then, I got an idea. What about, instead of going to prom, why not we try to do something else? 

MICHELLE 

Okay, I’m listening. 

JIMMY 

So, I looked up epic date ideas and came up with the perfect one…how does this sound: A private cruise across the Mississippi River? 

MICHELLE 

(intrigued) The Mississippi River? 

JIMMY 

Yeah! We can go to the St. Louis Arch, then go on a ship that sails across the Mississippi River. And, I was able to book a private cruise at 7:30 PM, which crucially, is the same time where prom begins. 

MICHELLE 

Wow. For once, you actually got creative. 

JIMMY 

And what’s more, it’s private. Which means, there will be no one else there. 

MICHELLE 

Now, that sounds more like it! 

JIMMY 

So, will you go to the Mississippi with me? 

MICHELLE 

Well… (A pause) Okay, I’m in. 

JIMMY 

Really? 

MICHELLE 

Yes. Don’t make a big deal out of it or I’ll change my mind. 

JIMMY 

Thank you. 

Michelle leaves the stage and Jimmy then immediately jumps for joy. 

JIMMY 

I did it! I finally got a date! It took me seven years, but I finally did it! Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! 

Jimmy runs away in excitement.