I am not a real girl anymore. I am a fake, a waste of air, a waste of space. Disgusting. I am worth less than dust but more than diamonds. People look at me and they want to draw me inside of them, listen to my secrets, but they're too scared. I am a contagious disease that nobody wants. I am alone. What a relief...

I am Raelyn Marie Jones. A girl, trying too hard to become a woman. I am a microscopic piece of time and space that no one really knows exists. I am out of place but I am also normal.

I am seventeen, Can't wait to be eighteen so I have an excuse to escape this hell hole they call my life. I am plain, but I am pretty in the simplest way. I have light brown hair that turn golden in the sunlight. It's straight, but I always over-straighten it anyway with my straightener. I have green eyes that I love but no one else really notices. I have small dimples when I smile and teeth that were born straight in my mouth, no braces needed.

I'm pretty, but I'm also ugly, bleeding where no one can see. I am a masterpiece, an artist and the art all at once. My canvas is my body. Up my arms, around my ankles, hiding under my ribs. I use no paint, I make the paint. I cut and make ruby red paint. I cut and when the scars form, there is art. I am amazing at what I do.

I will not allow myself to fall apart. I am helpless but not hopeless. I am strong. Stronger than you could ever imagine because I've gone on for this long. Sometimes I want to give up, but what's the use. I don't have enough motive to give up.

I am so many things, it's hard to believe. But you take what you get and this is me...