The idea started on a day like every other, nothing out of the ordinary was going on, nothing special at all. I got up at 7:45 AM to get ready for school, knowing that I'll probably get caught up in something and be hustling like a bat out of hell right before I leave, and forget something at home that was due that very day, which is totally annoying and always happens to me for some strange reason. I guess the one thing that was strange was that I was ready ten minutes after I got up, having been up right away instead of sluggishly stumbling around the house trying to figure out if I was still dreaming or if I was actually awake. I got my ripped kneed jeans and Disturbed concert T on extremely quickly and had almost everything in my favourite green purse, all ready to make the walk to school. I stopped to look around me, taking everything in with confidence, thinking today might actually be a good day and not a thing will go wrong. That's when I got onto my computer in my room and saw the time on my screen. 6:15 AM. OMG! I quickly snatched up my phone and looked at the display, feeling my jaw drop and my shoulders sag. I had gotten up an hour and a half early, thinking that my alarm had gone off, but really it was a text message from one of my friends that moved, Jocelyn Worden.

I groan and smash my head against my desk, feeling my glasses crashing and digging into my nose, completely cancelling out the pain on the forehead. I'm always just so amazed at how stupid I can be sometimes, not noticing that the wrong song played; instead of my Don't Stop Believing Glee version, I awoke to Gorgeous Nightmare by Escape the Fate.

I click into the new message, now ten minutes old and read her short message, “Hey Girl! Whats up???” I just shake my head and reply with the usual of me doing nothing and asking her why the heck she's waking me up so early.

A second after I press send, I get another one, one of the songs I love ringing out into my silent room, throughout the house. In the room next door I can hear my brother, Joe, tossing around in his bed, the sound of my ringer going straight through the wall. “Never mind girl! I got to start getting ready for school! Say hi to Becki for me!!!!” Another disappoint to add to the list of today events, and I only got up a few minutes ago, just great.

I just shake my head and continue on to my Facebook page, clicking into my auto play list on Youtube while I go, making sure to turn down the volume just a little bit so I don't get a bony fist to the face because I woke up my brother way before he was supposed to since he has a spare first thing in the morning so he can sleep in. What a cheater, I want something like that! Girls need their beauty sleep! I need it! So unfair, but one day, I'm going to be in the higher grades and actually qualify to be a senior, and will have a spare during the day.

Okay, no Facebook notifications, no messages on Hotmail or Gmail, and not too bad of weather. (Yes, I actually check the weather before I go to school, but how else am I going to know if anyone will be able to go? Doesn't matter if I'll go anyways, I'd probably go during a tornado, which is completely unlikely in Delisle Saskatchewan.) I click onto my start menu and bring up my Word Pad, and get to typing another chapter into a story I will never publish, and will probably never even finish. Who would ever want to read about a teenage girl who whines a lot and wants to be big in high school? Its just like every other persons life, they want to be remembered and make the most of the time she has with her freedom. If you can call waking up during the week at ridicules times to learn stuff we might not even need later in life freedom.

Its kind of a nice way to let out all of my difficulties with my high school, even though there's nothing really wrong with it, but that's just the problem! Delisle Composite should have some sort of flaw, something that sticks out like a sore thumb to everyone that walks by, but none are there. There's just the students that look at the community and think, 'Where's the Subway?'. I bet there's at least some minor details that are out of whack that I'm just not seeing just yet.

I quickly look down at the small digital clock on my computer and see that its a minute before my alarm is supposed to go off. The familiar “Dah dah dah dah...” starts to play and I know that my alarm has actually gone off this time. I snatch up my Storm 2 and click dismiss, knowing that the song would probably continue to play all throughout the day if I kept it at home and just left it, but it would have died way before then, and I also can't imagine purposely leaving my phone in my room when I could be texting the people standing next to me at lunch. Its extremely hilarious when I text Becki, she usually sees it when she has it outside of her backpack, and she just looks, then looks at me like I'm crazy; by then I'm already laughing my ass off because I love being really immature like that, it makes me feel so free, until she hits me on the arm and I laugh even harder. You've just got to love high school and all the crazy people in it.

I quickly sign out of everything, clicking out of Youtube before the song Loser Like Me Glee version can start, knowing that I'll probably listen to it during my walk to school since I'm just so awesome that I downloaded it and added it to my phone after I heard it on the episode. Who would have thought that they would choose to do original songs instead of songs on the top ten that are going to get annoying real quickly with how much they are replaying them. That's probably just my opinion though, but I'm the girl that finally listens to the hit songs a month or two after everyone else starts listening to them and loving them. Let's just say I'm weird and keep it at that shall we.

I grab all of my stuff and slowly walk out of the front door, ear buds in hand, looking for the playlist of the day that will be the story of my life. I decide to just stay with what I'd been listening to all of this morning and click into the one marked Glee. I skillfully stick my headphones in, swishing my hair behind my ears and head towards the school, knowing I'll be early, but since its only a couple weeks into school, I really don't want to get behind in my work, and there's an art project thats due by the end of the week that I'm only half done. (By the way, its Tuesday, if you weren't made aware of this already.) We are supposed to draw something that is true to us, something that we love and that we can't live without. I decided to make a portrait of one of my favourite books, Bloodthirsty by Flynn Meaney, and an MP3 with the song Something by Escape the Fate playing. Bloodthirsty is just such a good book, one day I know I'm going to change like that kid in there; oh whats his name? Finn? No wait, Finbar, ya thats it. Finbar Frame; he decides that since he's already got that weird look to him, he's going to change into a vampire. I'm not saying that I'm going to follow in his footsteps and become a creature of the night, but I want to change so badly that I'm almost considering it; almost, not quite desperate enough yet.

To change, its one of the most beautiful things in this world next to love and chocolate. A caterpillar changes into a butterfly, why can't I? How come I can't change into the girl that I want to be; the one that gets seen, gets appreciated, the one that is loved. I'm the one that is a shadow in the corner of the room, gets used for my work answers, the one that is getting ignored by my boyfriend. And if someone tries to say that at least I've got a nice loving family, they are SO wrong! Sure my family is loving, but NICE?! That's like trying to say they are normal and just as unnoticeable as me, which I wish they were. My dad, Chucky, is one of the strangest people ever; he has diabetes and all of these other problems, and he doesn't really care for changing them. And he looks super creepy with his balding patch grey hair and a belly thats so round it looks like he's pregnant with an alien. (I've actually mentioned when I'm going to have a little space brother or sister, and they just say I am the space daughter already, they don't need another one.) Then there is my brother, which you've already heard about, the one that is the complete opposite of my father. He is lean, tall, has muscles instead of flubber, and the only one who doesn't wear glasses in this family besides the stinky farty orange cat my mom named Garfield. He was actually named before he got fat which is just proof that my mom can get anything fat on demand. And last but not least, is my mother, Sonya which literally translates out to loud. Do I really have to describe her in any other way?

That's the 'nice' loving family that I'm stuck with, and sometimes I'm happy that I wasn't raised by anyone else, but sometimes its like I'm going to be cursed for the rest of my life. They are just kind of like one of those families that you offer up on Ebay for really cheap, and they get sold to creepy people on the other side of the world for even cheaper labour. Like my brother always tells us, “Go into the kitchen and make me a sandwich!”

I look up to see that I'm already in the school, walking down the hall towards my classroom. I can feel more gloom sinking into my bones, making a nest in my heart, because who else would be waiting in the classroom for someone to show up so she can talk other then the one and the only Alyx Kearnan. I can almost feel my eyes water with the disappointment that I'm not going to be alone to work on my project, that I'm going to actually have to talk a lot before school starts. Alyx just knows how to talk about a lot of stuff, just about anything that goes on during her weekend, or last day; if she got bit by a mosquito and couldn't stop itching it till she made her parents make a special trip for After Bite, she'd be talking about it if I didn't find a topic that would occupy that entire time before the bell would ring. And I'd have to leave for my first class, math, and she'd have to stay here for here English languages arts class.

I guess it couldn't be that bad, maybe if I just get her onto the topic of her bunny Jesse, or maybe something about her flower garden that she had this summer, then I wouldn't have to contribute. I look back into the classroom from my spot outside the door and actually look at her; she's standing at the back, looking out the window at the passing cars and the teachers cars that are already here and parked. She has this cat like stance, as though she's ready to pounce, and I know that that's not what we're going to be talking about at all and that I'll have to be actually listening. I have a feeling that I'm going to have to give advice or something, which is a pretty good area of mine, but it must be super important if she's willing to caught a ride with her parents just to be early and be able to talk to me privately before school.

I sigh and walk into the classroom, tugging out my headphones and pulling my hair back out from behind my ears, trying to hide the displeased face that I always have on every morning when I actually have to talk too much. I head over to my lock, number 21, calling over my shoulder a “Hey,” before she sees that I've come in and haven't said hello. I put my bag in and grab my project and a pencil, waiting for the stream to start; and just on time it does, but the only thing I can think is, 'If I were to change into a vampire bat right now, would I either burst into flames or scare Alyx enough for her to start going to Becki more?”. I feel myself smile, chuckling a little as I sit down into a cold desk nearby, listening as she comes closer to sit next to me, completely unaware of my thought. Which is a good thing cause I'd probably burst into flames AND freak her out, and interesting thing to do for my last moment on Earth.

So, so far you must have already realized that I'm an extremely weird person that doesn't have very many friends, but you must also realize that this is actually really close to the truth of everything that has happened on the days following. I'm sure that if I put EVERYTHING that is too true to be normal, most of the people who are close to these characters would rip my head off and hang on a rope at the top of the flag pole in front of our one story school. I'm not really ready to have that happen just yet, so I'm going to be very careful and leave out stuff that could cause my death. Though I do believe that the really peace hard Taylor Swift fans are already attempting to find out where I live so they can very gently and nicely, shove poisonous flowers down my throat so I can't say anything else about her anymore. I'm pretty sure that some of that will also be true for the Justin Bieber fans, Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montanna fans, and quite possibly the people who didn't mind listening to Friday because their eardrums didn't burst when her nasal strips fell off in the middle of the song and she sounded like she was choking. I'm just asking to be murdered aren't I? Or be sued, but who in their right mind would want anything that I own? It's all stuff that's been broken because I leave it on the floor and don't bother to pick it up, even after I stub my toe on it or just hear a crunching sound as my foot breaks the s*** out of it. I dare them to take it! There's more chances that they'll get eaten by the mutant tiger hiding in my closet that I call Fred because it has a high squeaky voice and always offers to snort Raid with me in the middle of the night; its even weirder when he finally realizes what his voice sounds like, but he always leaves to go grape people walking in the alleys of Delisle. I think there's something wrong with me, or maybe he's slipping something into my food when I leave it in my room. Scary.

Back to reality though, you know, the place that I seem to zone from almost every third sentence because something interesting happens around me when I'm writing this. Maybe I should just take the example of the girl I'm writing my stories about; lock myself in the room while I have a creepy playlist with the song Creep Crawl in it, playing in the background. It'd probably be a lot better then writing in the middle of class and missing who Joan of Arc is when we have a test coming up. There I go again! Please, just bare with me for a little while, I tend to write like this for a reason, and most of the time it comes in handy later on, I promise.

So, after I got blah blah blah attacked by Alyx and I got the crazy idea to turn into a bat and scare her to death, and myself I might add, I began to work on my art project that kind of sucked to start with. One thing you'll learn about me is that I'm really bad at random free hand drawing that doesn't really show much of a point to me. Its a really bad habit, I know, but its just the way I was born. Deal with it!

Alyx sat there for a minute, taking in everything that she's told my unlistening ears, preparing for her next banter on things that are coming in style, things she did, and how she's going to train animals to do tricks when she's older. Or maybe it was welding this time; maybe next time I should actually try to pay attention, but she'd have to slow down a bit, instead of spitting sentences at me as if she were shooting me with a machine gun. She usually really listens to me when I have a problem with say, my boyfriend and his ignoring skills that he's been testing out on me, I guess I should also return the favour one of these days.

“So what plans are you guys making up for this year? I bet its something good, it always is. And don't worry if the girls in the other groups give you trouble, they'll love it in the end, they always do. Oh! Remember that year when everyone broke out to that 'I like to move it move it, I like to move it move it,' song? It was hysterical and enjoyable at the same time,” Alyx continues onto previous years of mini pranks that everyone loves to do, and that a lot of us are partially famous for, but that was back in elementary school; this is high school, more rules and way more responsibilities, and its been way harder to do stuff like that. It was practically impossible last year to get everyone to drink slushies all day during school since we aren't supposed to, and it ended badly in gym last period when a girl got hit in the stomach with a dodge ball and puked all over everyone around her, and she didn't stop there either; she even got the chance to puke all over the gym teacher and the principle, and she took it too. They were covered in lime green juices, and all I could think was 'Omg, she looks even skinnier now! What is up with that?!'. Now that I'm in grade nine, I know why, and can even place where this goes on. Models. What good role models huh.

I felt kind of bad for being the one to both throw the ball and for having her participate in the slushy drinking contest during lunch. I haven't really thought about that day since it happened to be honest, not even the day afterwards. The girl, Alice Unger, didn't really care that she puked a lot, she just cared about keeping the secret of the idea and its origin. Nobody could bribe anyone in our class, not unless its a hundred bucks and a chance to be principle for a day, they all just enjoyed pulling pranks every year. Nobody knew who made them, and nobody really knew who did them unless it was a public thing and our entire class did it. We never got punished for it either; every kid is a little angel at home so their parents don't suspect a thing. The problem is, I haven't been thinking about this years at all, and that's starting to freak me out. I usually have about three genius ideas to contribute to the meeting, but I can't seem to get anything at all.

Am I beginning to lose my touch? Will there only be the choices made by the boys? Ones that aren't even that funny and usually involve something that has farts in it or something that we will ALL get in trouble for, even if half of us don't even participate? All I can do is sigh, which interrupted Alyx a little bit, but she just jumped back into talking about something with the colour green.

I just continue to delve into my mind, ignoring the sinking feeling that we might all get either detention or expulsion. Maybe something will come to me during school today, but that isn't really that likely, the only good thing for a school day is to make poetry that makes me cry its so horrible, or stories that I never seem to finish. Everyone's got to get their inspiration from somewhere, this year I just need to find something that will inspire me instead of my crazy mind. You can tell that I'm a little messed up, just a little, since the only kind of poetry I can write has to have something to do with death, breakups, love, or even just darkness in general. Anti-depressants anyone? No? WELL FINE THEN!

“Uh Carilynne? What are you drawing? Is that the art assignment?” Asks Alyx, peaking over my arm that I was using to block the picture from her, but I swear it was unintentional! I was day thinking!

Her question kind of startles me; I wasn't even aware that I was still drawing. I sneak a glance down at my picture, and I could feel my mouth dropping down in shock. It was- “Hey guys! I came early today just so we could all hang!” says Becki as she glides into the room, as though she doesn't even need to walk. I snap my head up and quickly pick up everything from the desk, making sure that neither Becki nor Alyx could see the picture. I get up from the cold plastic, the intensity of the cold going straight through my jeans and shirt. I swear its as though this school puts the air conditioner on in the middle of the night. Completely bizarre, but I wouldn't put it passed this school to do something like that.

I head over to my locker as Alyx moves in on Becki, the poor girl, she came to this school this year with the rest of the new kids from over at Vanscoy. I shake my head, quickly sneaking her a glance, knowing that she'll get it, letting her know that I won't save her cause I already got the big talk already. I shove my picture and my art stuff into the top of my locker, avoiding all the books and papers as they fall out and clatter onto the ground. I really should clean this thing soon, I can't even find my backpack anymore. At least my locker isn't as bad as Trent Wood's is; he had a mold covered chocolate milk container and a cinnamon bun that had its own Eco-system surrounding it at the bottom of us locker. I guess that kind of goes for most guys and their things, my brother's room is the exact same, except we KNOW there's an Eco-system in there, its kind of hard to miss when cat's help but go in there whenever they explore the house.

“Hey Carilynne, did you remember to bring that sheet back for the field trip today? Mrs. Land said she'd still take them even if we brought them today; I was so excited for the trip this morning that I literally taped it to my stomach!” I heard Becki's words, but they just echo throughout the room, and all I can feel is a deep sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. The note was on my dresser at home!

Every part of my life seems to go wrong at one point or another, but forgetting my sheet for a big field trip is just beyond normalcy. I’m usually the one that brings the sheet back the day after we got it, but I’ve been putting it off this time, knowing that there’s a slight chance I might not be able to go because of the money factor; luckily, last night my mother said that I can for sure go, that the cheque had gone through, but that darn sheet needed to go back today. I guess I can’t be too sad about missing it though; all we were doing was going to the art centre over in Saskatoon, which I’ve already been to with my mother when she and her coworkers went on this weird boat ride thing down the river and back. It was extremely fun, but we always had to worry about how many people were on each side, else we could tip it, and I personally was freaking out about that for a while before I went up on top. The view from onto was amazing, enough to take my breath away and make me forget every little thing that I was freaking out about; the breeze was sweet, and it ruffled my hair just a little. The sun shone down on us, basking us in the warmth of nature, and I knew then that I loved little moments in time that are better then the reason for life.

I’m sure that my mom won’t be too impressed though about me missing this trip, but maybe there is a slight chance that I can go with everyone though; maybe if I get the teacher to call my mother, which she’ll hopefully be at home still, I’ll be able to go make fun of and marvel at some of the artwork there, especially the 3D moving bookmarks in the gift shop, they are totally awesome. My mom was nice enough to buy me one when we went, and I have been wondering what they have now, though I still do love my moving wolf on the prowl. Sometimes my bookmark is even more entertaining then the book itself.

I'm going to have to wait till the teacher comes into the classroom in order for me to ask her to call my mother, but is there really any reason for me to go with the class? I've seen everything there already, and going with the class, especially the boys, would ruin the peace and quiet of the place. Others would be actually looking at the art, and they'll be looking at some rounder kid eating and ice cream.

Maybe I'm a little hard on them, but they haven't done much better in the previous years that I've known them; its the same thing all the time, making fun of the kids they don't know or don't understand, which is super depressing to me considering a lot of people don't truly understand me half the time. My friends get a pretty good picture of what I'm all about, and tell me to ignore the others when they tell me that I'm weird or a freak. In grade 7 I was actually called Fiona from Shrek and I know for a fact that they weren't calling me a princess. That one really tore me down, but I just smiled and pretended not to notice. If the guy who called me that knew I had cried the entire time during my ten minute walk home, he'd either make fun of me or try to apologize.

Times are different now though, I've got my girls and guys that I hang out with almost every second I'm in this school, so I just brush off the insults like their throwing a feather at me. Sometimes they hit home though, and I get this unbelievable shake in my arm, and I literally clench my fist every time to stop it, but when they see they kind of just pick a new target. I've never really understood that till Calli pulled me aside after school and told me to never listen to the boys, that if I started a fight, I'd be worse, that they would take it as though they were right.

Calli Richmond has always been a good friend to me, ever since kindergarten, and she's always told me the truth, so I took her words to heart and never did a thing when they said anything again. Its too bad that we don't really hang out as much anymore, I kind of miss her weirdness sometimes, but her and Becki don't seem to get along for the strangest of reasons. I never really understood, no matter how many times I've gotten them to explain it to me. It's really hard having friends that literally glare at each other when they are in the same room together. Who knows though, maybe one day they'll get along?

I think I just choked on my own bullshit for a second there. Girls with a blood feud for each other will die trying to get the other to back down, we are even worse then the boys since we ignore the people we don't like, even if they were our best friends, and guys just punch each other in the face and walk home together with blood streaming down their faces. I don't know if I could actually hit someone though, even if I was in karate for a year, just the thought of hurting someone else physically kinda makes me cringe.

I spy a woman about the same height as the rest of us, but with better clothes and I know that Mrs. Land has finally entered the classroom. I start towards her desk at the back of the room, not to far from me since I never left my locker near the back windows. I swerve around kids walking around or just standing in the most inconvenient places and make it to her paper cover desk just as she does.

“Mrs. Land? I left my paper for the trip at home and was wondering if you could call my mom for permission instead? The cheque had just gone through last night and we were waiting to see if it would before we handed in the sheet.”

Mrs. Land looks up at me, sadness lurking just beneath the surface, and I know what the answer will be, before she even has the chance to say it out loud, “Sorry Carri, but you know the rules, I have to have a written consent form.”

“But-”

“I'm sorry, and I'll be sure to write out a cheque for your mother with the same amount that she payed. I'm sure that some people will be staying back as well so you can all go to your regular classes, otherwise you can go on the computers for the day,” she says, and turns around towards her desk so that I'll get the hint that the discussion is finished.

I'll spare all of you some of the gruesome things I mumbled as I walked back to my locker, and my friends who'll be leaving me at the worst place in the world, school. I'll be sure to ask them all about it tomorrow though, I'm really curious to find out if May or Becki like art. Alyx and Anthony will probably just talk and space out for the rest of the day though.

“Okay kids, whoever hasn't handed in their sheets, do it now! We have one person for sure who isn't going!” Yells Land above every other voice in the room, and I watch as several kids start walking towards her with sheets and money in their hands. I just groan and turn back to my locker, beginning to pull off my bag and jacket that I put on again before, but now won't be needing.

“I wonder who's not going, I bet they are just dying, knowing that they have to stay at school today,” says Becki beside me. Hearing her say that just makes me die a little more inside, it really hurts knowing that they are making fun of me without them knowing it, “Hey Carri, why are you taking off your- oh. Wait, YOUR the one not going?!” I just shake my head and try to ignore the fact that they are all making a semi circle around me so their conversation will be private; it should be comforting, but to me at the moment, its really smothering.

“Well what are we going to do?” whispers May.

“Sneak her onto the bus like drugs across the border?” says Anthony, but we all just stare at him like he's crazy, and he just kind of backs away, back into May's side where he hugs the life out of her.

“We are going to do anything, YOU are going on the bus and I'M going to stay here and play explode the fly by staring at it. Now go hand in all your sheets.”

I watch as Becki looks down at her sheet and looks back up with a crazy look on her face that has always scared me since she's always the best to go to in a tight situation, “Hey guys, I'll go hand in the sheets for us; pass them here.” I watch as May hands over her's, and I hear Anthony and Alyx say something about already having handed theirs in a while ago. Becki looks a little disappointed at this but starts walking, but she's heading towards the front of the classroom, the exact opposite of where Mrs. Land is with the crowd of people still surrounding her. I watch as Becki gets closer to the door, and then she quickly turns towards the trash and dumps the papers in.

It seems I'll be having a little bit of company today, and by the look on Becki's face, we aren't going to be staying at school at all. She gives the signal for May and I to grab our stuff and hers, and she walks out the classroom. I turn to my companion for the day and shrug my shoulders as she turns raised eyebrows towards me. She smiles a little evil smile and I can hear her say 'I call the mic!” It seems we're going to my house to play Rock Band, and I'm stuck with drums again.

I grab my bag and Becki's and head towards the door, May at my side. I say to no one in particular as I pass the thresh hold, “I'm going to trade you all in one day, and then I'm going to watch and laugh at you guys as you'll have to play the drums.”