It wasn't until 5:46 am that I found out that she was missing. And it wasn't until then that I realized that I knew where she was. I remember when I was four years old and she taught me how to tie the laces on my shoes. And when I was eight and she taught me how to ride the bike mom bought me for my birthday. "Imagine your riding a horse, keep your body still," she didn't let go of my bike until I told her to. She always did what everyone told her to. Everyone liked her for that, but now that I think of it, maybe that was the reason she's gone.
It was April 2nd, mom's birthday. Aunt Linda bought mom the necklace that she always caught mom looking at in the jewelry store. Every Saturday mom, Aunt Linda and I always went to downtown where all of the shops were. We knew we couldn't afford anything there, it was just to spend some time together. The first thing we did when we came to downtown was go to the jewelry store, which was mom's favorite store.Dad bought mom some pots for the kitchen and a boquet of flowers which was typical of dad. Dad always bought something useful, the pots, and something that would make mom happy, the flowers. I bought mom a pair of shoes from downtown. I asked Aunt Linda for the money and she said as long as mom would like the present she was find with giving me the money. I convinced Sam to put something together for his present to mom. I even gave him the money to buy something but all he bought was a pack of chewing gum. He never did anything nice for mom or dad. All he ever did was lay on the couch and sleep. Occasionally he would get up to eat a snack or go to the bathroom. He didn't go to school so he had nothing to do at home.
After we ate the cake dad bought from the bakery two blocks down mom opened her presents. She opened dad's present first and laughed when she saw the pots. I knew that laugh, she was floating in happiness on the inside. I told her to open mine next. My present was wrapped in green wrapping paper with a silver bow on the top, it was the prettiest looking one on the table. As soon as she opened it up I saw her face glow in shock. She tried them on and to my relief they fit perfectly. Mom told me those were the prettiest shoes she's ever worn. I'll always remember that because that because those words made my day. Next she opened Aunt Linda's present. I couldn't wait to see the look on mom's face when she opened it. She carefully picked up the present until we heard a loud thud from Sam's room. I looked around and realized that Sam wasn't with us this whole time. Dad immediately ran to his room and opened the door. He was in there for a good 30 seconds while the rest of us waited in silence. When he came out his face was blank and we were waiting for him to say something. Immediately he began searching the house and screaming in his loud voice "Sam? Sam? Where are you son?" Without any questions we began to do the same. I went into the living room, mom checked the bathrooms, and I didn't see where Aunt Linda went. Even now when I ask mom and dad they always say they don't know where she went that day. The living room was empty so I checked Sam's room again. All I saw were piles of clothes on the ground and food wrappers on his bed. Then I saw the curtain move with the wind from his window. Sam never opened the windows in his room. "Mom! Dad! Aunt Linda! Come in here!" Mom and Dad came rushing in and I was too focused to realize Aunt Linda wasn't there. "The window's open. Do you think he snuck out?" This wasn't the first time Sam did this. The day he told us he was dropping out of highschool, mom and dad got really mad and sent him to his room with no dinner. In the morning when dad went to Sam's room, he didn't find him there. The window was open and we had to search the neighborhood. Dad found him asleep behind the garbage dump a couple blocks down. Ever since that day, Sam became who he is today- a bum.
Mom and dad climbed out of the window and I followed them out. Dad said he would check the garbage dump and mom and I checked nearby. For a second I was about ask mom where Aunt Linda was but I got distracted when I heard mom call my name. They found Sam behind the garbage dump again sobbing his heart out. We walked him home and dad said if this happened again he would put a motion detector on Sam's window. Sam said he would do anything just to never see his family again. Dad and Sam started yelling at eachother for a couple of minutes while mom and I sat in the living room. Mom was crying but she hid her face in her sweater so I couldn't see. Whenever mom cried about Sam I would always say the same thing, "He will learn, he will learn," and mom would try her best to lift the sides of her mouth into a smile.
The noise from Sam's room started to tone down and dad walked out with his hands on his head. I figured it was my turn to talk to Sam so I walked in his room. Sam and I always got along. He always used to say that he loved me more than mom and dad ever will. That always used to scare me. I didn't understand why he hated mom and dad so much. The ones that fed him, and the ones that gave him shelter. But I knew that Sam was the closest person I had to a friend so I loved him back, and he treated me like I was his only reason for living. "Come up here Marge," he patted next to where he was sitting on his bed. I jumped up onto his bed and he threw a blanket on top of me. We both just lied there for a couple of minutes just staring at the ceiling. It's hard to think that Sam actually was the most loving person anyone's ever met. After Katrina hit we all moved to St. Louis to stay with Aunt Linda. That was the worst year we've ever had. Mom and dad were out of work but luckily we had Aunt Linda to count on. Mom kept on crying that month and dad had to take her out of the house most of the day to calm her down. Sam and I would stay with Aunt Linda all day until someone enrolled us in a new school. I was too young to realize what was happening but Sam knew and he would try his best to keep me happy and entertained at home. He taught me how to juggle until I got it perfectly and I still can juggle to this day. Even though I was happy, I knew my family was hiding something from me. One morning when I woke up I heard screaming and crying from the kitchen. I looked on the other side of the bed and Sam wasn't there. I walked into the kitchen and Sam was yelling at Aunt Linda. Aunt Linda just sat on a chair and sobbed. As soon as they saw me Sam stopped yelling and told me to go back into my room. That was the day we found out Uncle Bob died.
"Sam?" His eyes were closed so I tapped him on the shoulder. His eyes opened and he smiled when he saw my face. "That one day when we were at Aunt Linda's house, why was Aunt Linda crying?"
"Sam just looked back at the ceiling in deep thought and he turned to me and said, "What happened that day in St. Louis is not important Marge, just forget about it," he patted me on the back like he always did and smiled.
"But Sam, it is important. I've never seen Aunt Linda cry that hard in my life." Sam sighed and looked frustrated. We've had this conversation a lot lately. I always asked him and he would get frustrated with me every time. But I knew something happened that month that was important. Sam grabbed my shoulder and shook me hard.
"Marge, listen to me. Stop asking me about that day okay? Aunt Linda was just having some problems with Uncle Tom at the time and she was just upset, okay?"
I still remember that day when we found out about Uncle Tom. Mom and dad admitted Aunt Linda into a mental hospital for a while until things settled down. We all made visits once in a while to see how she was doing. As much as mom and dad convinced Sam to come with us he refused to come. When Uncle Tom died Sam never left the house, or his room. He stayed in the house all the time until the day we left St. Louis. Uncle Tom was found shot and dead on the street a couple blocks down from Aunt Linda's house. Aunt Linda said she never wanted to be near that house again so she came back with us to Louisiana.
I slept in Sam's room that night and before we went to bed Sam asked me to sing a song for him. Sam always said that my singing instantly put him in a good mood each time he heard it. He said that all the bad things that were happening in his life suddenly disappeared when he listened to me sing. I sang "Silent Night" to Sam until he fell asleep.
When I woke up it was still dark outside. I'm an early bird, I got it from Aunt Linda. She always got up early to make breakfast for Uncle Tom before he went to work. Sam was still asleep on his bed so I tip-toed out of the room to check on mom and dad. They were still sound asleep so I didn't wake them. Usually Aunt Linda is awake before I which was not the case today. I tip-toed to her room but she wasn't in there. I figured she would be in the bathroom so I waited for a couple of minutes. In the meantime I poured myself a bowl of cereal and turned on the TV. I was so distracted I didn't realize that Aunt Linda hadn't come out of the bathroom in twenty minutes. I knocked on the bathroom door and when no one opened it I walked in and it was completely empty. "Aunt Linda?" I said as I walked upstairs.
"Sshh!" I heard coming from mom and dad's room. I forgot they were asleep. I looked in every single room and Aunt Linda wasn't there. I had no choice but to wake up Sam. "Sam, Sam. Wake up!" I whispered and shook him. "Sam!" His eyes opened and he did a loud yawn. "Sam be quiet mom and dad are sleeping. Sam you gotta help me I can't find Aunt Linda. I checked the bathrooms and every single room in the house." Sam sprung from his bed. "Did you check outside?" I ran out of his room and opened the front door. Sam followed me out. The sky looked so pretty. It was orange, purple and blue all together. Sam and I walked all around the house but didn't find her anywhere.
If it was anyone else missing, I wouldn't have jumped to conclusions like I did that day. But it was Aunt Linda. It was dangerous to leave her alone for too long. "Sam, where do you think she is?" My palms were starting to sweat and my heart was beating fast.
Sam just yawned again. "Marge, I don't know where the hell she is! Who cares anyway?" He walked back into the house scrathing his head. I was really confused about why Sam exploded like that. He was worried about Aunt Linda just a couple seconds before.
"Sam, please." I broke out into tears. Sam turned around to comfort me. I wiped my tears and asked. "Sam, why don't you like Aunt Linda?" Sam wiped the tears off my face and I stopped crying and just waited for him to reply.
He took a deep breath and said. "Marge, Aunt Linda and I are fine. I'll bet she just took an early morning walk."
"No Sam you're not fine! I know you don't like her Sam, just tell me why? Ever since you came back from St Louis-"
"Marge! I told you I don't want to talk about this, and I know you don't want to hear it."
"No Sam, I really do want to hear it. Please tell me Sam! I won't tell anyone." Sam sat down on the patio chair and I sat on his lap. The sun was beginning to come up and we heard the noise of mom and dad waking up.
"Marge, you know about Aunt Linda, you know how she's...-" he waited a second for me to catch up.
"Yeah I know, go on."
"Well she's not a normal person. She just doesn't know how to treat the people she loves."
"What do you mean Sam? She loves me and she's my favorite aunt."
"Not you Marge, Uncle Tom. She didn't know how to behave around Uncle Tom," he took a deep breath and said "Marge I don't know if I should be telling you-"
"No tell me Sam! Go on! She didn't know how to behave around Uncle Tom... Is that why they were fighting that one day. Because she was mean to Uncle Tom?" I sounded impatient and desperate to know.
"Kids, why are you up so early?" Dad woke up. I immediately switched back to reality.
"Dad! Dad! We can't find Aunt Linda! We've looked everywhere!" I jumped up from Sam's lap.
Dad rubbed his eyes slowly processing what I said. "She's not in her room?"
"No dad! Go find her! What if she started crying again and ran away?" Dad ran inside the house and I followed him. He woke up mom and as soon as she heard the words "Aunt Linda" and "gone" she sprung up with bright eyes. Dad called the neighbors to see if they saw her anywhere. A long time ago we told the neighbors that if they ever saw Aunt Linda walking out of our house alone to let us know immediately. When they said no, dad called the cops. The cops are good friends of ours. We've called them a lot whenever Sam went missing which was pretty often. The cops came rushing over in a minute's time. They checked the whole neighborhood. The whole time mom and I were sitting in the living room silently praying that they would find Aunt Linda. We heard the mumbling of dad talking to the cops outside. Sam was in his bedroom sleeping with his pillow over his face.
Dad walked into the room and sat down on the couch next to mom without saying a word. "Well they still didn't find her," he put his hands on his head and sighed. "They're notifying every police station in Southern Louisiana."
Mom started to say something but then it turned into a cry. I patted her back to calm her down. "I don't understand where she could've gone. Why would she need to go anywhere?"
"It's not about where she is, but what she is doing. What if she tries to-" dad looked at me then stopped to say what he was about to say.
"Tries to what dad?"
"Nothing dear," he turned to mom and said, "If we kept her in St. Louis this would've never happened. Mom turned to dad with a disgusted face.
"If we kept her in St. Louis this wouldn't have happened? If we kept her in St. Louis they would've killed her!"
"But for the right reasons. We knew it was going to happen someday." I couldn't believe what dad was saying. Mom's face was starting to turn red.
"Don't you dare talk about my sister like that!" Mom was furious. I quietly left the room because I didn't want to be around the fighting. I walked upstairs to Aunt Linda's room and lied down on her bed. On her bedside table I found the present she didn't give to mom yet. I looked at it for a while and hugged it. On the bottom of the present I felt something that didn't feel like wrapping paper. It was a card Aunt Linda wrote for mom. It wasn't in an envolope or anything, it was just taped on the wrapping paper.
Dear Elizabeth,
Happy Birthday and may all your wishes come true. God bless your children and may God watch over Sam.
Aunt Linda
Aunt Linda always had this weird connection with Sam. She always used to say that she would jump off a bridge just to get Sam to forgive her. I never knew what she wanted Sam to forgive her for. But I did know one thing, Aunt Linda wasn't afraid to do it. Last summer Aunt Linda and I went to the bookstore every Saturday to read after dinner. Everytime before we left, Aunt Linda begged Sam to come with us. Sam always refused to come which wasn't surprising. But one day Aunt Linda was so desperate she said she would shave her head just to get him to come. We all thought she was joking and we had a good laugh until she walked out of the bathroom. Aunt Linda cut off all her hair. She was crazy. She would always do weird stuff like that. That's why I sort of agreed with what dad said but on the other hand I didn't because I loved her.
That's when I realized where she was. I leaped off of Aunt Linda's bed and ran downstairs. I tripped on the last three steps but it didn't matter at the time. When I ran into the living room mom and dad weren't there so I figured they would be outside. I ran out the front door and while panting for air I told dad. Dad told me to get Sam and then we would go look there. I ran into Sam's room and shook him until he woke up.
"Sam, sam! I think I know where Aunt Linda is!" I told him and he didn't look happy or surprised at all. He looked like he did before I told him.
"Sam! Didn't you hear me? I know where she is! Why don't you care?" Tears started pouring out of my eyes but I wiped them as soon as they did so I could have a serious conversation with him.
"I don't care because I know she's dead!" It was really unexpected for him to yell like that. It became silent in the room.
"What do you mean she's dead?"
"I mean she killed herself! She's not at the stupid bookstore! She's at the bridge! She went there last night! Don't you get it by now?"
"Get what?"
"She killed Uncle Bob!" I thought Sam was drunk or something. That couldn't be true and if it was I would be horrified. "I know because I was there Marge! I saw it happen! That's why she would always be crying and that's why she's so crazy!"
Dad heard us from outside because we were so loud and he came into Sam's room. "What's going on in here?"
I cried and I ran up to dad and hugged him. "Daddy she's at the bridge." I explained it all to dad and the next thing I knew we were all driving on our way to the bridge in a police car. Apparently mom and dad had no idea about what Sam told me. It was all a shock to them too and we all had an even bigger shock when we found out that Sam was right.