I wake up to the sound of buzzing above me. I’m lying on a hard and uncomfortable cot and around me are white plaster walls looking dirty and aged. I look down and I’m still wearing my working clothes. I become cold realizing I am in my skinny jeans and tank top. I try to sit up but dizziness overtakes me and I quickly lay back down. My head aches and throbs as I close my eyes. Last night come rushing back to me. I was ending my shift last night and then…


Forgetting my pain I open my eyes and jump out of the cot. I look around and walk towards the door. It doesn’t have a doorknob, and looks like a big piece of wood. As I walk up to it, it suddenly opens with a rush and hits me on the head. I fall against the wall with a loud thud.



A young man who seems a bit older than me is standing in the doorway. He looks startled for a moment at the sudden impact and shuts the door quickly behind him. His eyes are dark blue, a stormy color. His hair a caramel blonde and looks neatly cut. He is wearing a black v-neck and cargo pants. The shirt outlines every inch of muscle on his arms and chest, and as I realized I was staring, I quickly remembered the pain in my forehead. I silently curse and try to stand up. The same rushing dizziness came to me and I start falling again but he catches me by my elbow.



“Come along now,” he says in a smooth silky voice. “Someone is waiting to speak with you,” this time he says in a stern voice. Yet as he pulls me up, he has a gentle grip on my arm and I obediently follow. I try to fight the panic that’s building in my chest, sending my heart into a skittering, erratic rhythm. He leads me through a narrow, dim hallway. There are a couple doors to our right, all of them made of steel and impossible to break down. There are no windows and it smells musky and humid, and I understand we’re in what could be an underground complex. We make a slight right turn and he stops at a door marked with small red numbers; 5996. He knocks three times and I hear heavy footsteps coming from the other side. The door opens, a bit heavily, and we enter a room filled with more muscular men dressed all the same – black v-necks, army cargo pants, and combat boots. In that moment I remember a similar looking man standing in our living room a couple of nights before my parents disappeared.











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He was impatiently talking with my Papa in hushes tones and I remember my Papa’s sad, guilty and fearful stricken face. They didn’t know I was listening. I was crouched in the stairs peeking in on them, only seeing the back of the big man, and my Papa’s face. I could make out only a bit of their conversation, “…hurry out of here…” and “…she will be safe, I promise you…” The scary man left with a rush and slam of the door and I quietly ran back up the stairs before my Papa caught me.











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As these men look at me, it dawns on me that they somehow already know me. The man that brought me guides me to a lone chair that faces these men and makes me sit. Probably thinking I would run away with all the intimidating glances, he also handcuffs me to the chair. I limply sit in the chair staring back at these bulky men, and wait for someone to say something. Finally, the man who I recognize from the bar stands and walks toward me.




“Anastasiya,” he calmly says.




As I hear my name, I stiffen suddenly really aware that they know me. He sees my fear and confusion and suddenly starts to laugh. Then all of them join in but he quickly gestures with his hand to be quiet. When all is silent again, he comes nearer and crouches with my eye level.




“Don’t vorry, ve’re on your side. I know it must be hard for you to believe, but I promise you von thing; ve vill not hurt you and ve vill keep you safe. Ve vant you to be on our side, ve are not who you think ve are,” he pauses. “Your father, I knew him well.”




I stiffen at the mention of my Papa, and have an urge to lash out on him and blame him for my father’s disappearance.




He goes on. “He vas vonce von of us, our leader.” He has a look of pride in his eyes for a second and then sadness the next. “But he betrayed us, and also left you behind. Ve promised ve vould keep you safe from all ze danger and zose who took him avay, and ve hope you vill be just like him von day: Our leader and our strongest veapon.” His eyes seemed to sparkle and he looking at me like I was something very special to him.




“Why should I believe you?” I asked sternly and carefully to not give away my fear. I looked straight into his eyes and for a moment I see my father and he quickly turns away. I can’t believe him, I think. They take me out of ordinary into a place that looks dark and far away, and expect me to somehow “be von of them”. The man stands and starts quietly pacing the floor. Everyone’s eyes are affixed on him, including mine. All of them seem to know that I would ask this and they all nod towards him. They look at one another, and he stops again and turns towards me.




“Ve need your father back. You are our strength and also his biggest weakness. You must understand zat you are our only chance. I hope zat you as vell vant him back to, no?” He proceeds to longingly stare at me with his dark eyes waiting for my answer.





Something about the way he said these words made me relent and want to trust these people. “So when do I start,” I say after a while. The mention of my father really makes me want him back, and I think this was their goal all along. I still have a strong sense to trust them, since they didn’t hurt me. I feel the tension in the room subside and they are all nodding in approval.





“Very good my child,” he smiles at me. “Let’s start by me introducing myself to you. My name is Victor. Anastasiya, I velcome you to ze Russian Mafia.”

My training days were forced and awful. My day starts out with a bucket of iced water spilling over me. I run five miles every morning, and eat nothing but granola bars and beef jerky. They teach me how to shoot guns and use knives. I guess I have my father’s mafia genes, because all of this comes to me almost naturally. They set out different obstacles and I become angrier and anxious every day to find the man who took my father. Victor tells me more about my father each day. I realize that I and he have a lot in common, and this makes Victor more proud of me. I become close to these men, and they become almost like a family to me. I always think of Lena, my best friend, and what she would be thinking of my absence. More importantly, I think of my grandma who I lived with ever since. She is probably looking around all over the city for me, but I don’t think of it too much because these thoughts are always replaced with images of me and my Papa and Mama reuniting. I know that each day I grow closer to my mission.








One day I’m walking through the hallway towards my room and I hear Victor and someone talking through the other side of the door. I lean in carefully and listen to what they are saying.





“…she vill do it, he force and anger is growing bigger,” Victor is saying.





“I just don’t understand vhy you von’t allow us to finish him off ourselves. When she realizes vat ve have done, ve’re all in jeopardy.” This voice sounded familiar but it was hard to recognize through the steel door. “You’re practically training her to kill us.” His voice is filled with fear and regret.






“She is still but a young woman, I don’t believe she has a chance against us.” Someone shuffles towards the door, and I quickly and quietly jog towards my room. As I close my door behind me, the other door opens. I hear him coming towards my room and I pretend to be enhances in studying my paperwork of locations. Sergey, the man who hit me with the door walks into the room and smiles at me. So that’s who was arguing with Victor. From what I heard, they must have been talking about me, but I didn’t understand what they meant. Training to kill us? All in jeopardy? Now I was really confused.






“Are you alright Miss Anna?” he asks.






“Oh yes of course!” My voice sounded quivery and a little too high. He gives me a look of suspicion and then he nods and leaves.

I thought about what they said that night. I knew it was about me, there was no other girl they could be talking about. I had my first nightmare. I was running and running towards darkness and his voice was calling my name. As I think I am coming closer, he drifts farther away but I have no idea whose voice it is. I woke with a start into the night, and I have an urge to go outside.



As I walk out, I see a dim light coming from a room down the hallway. I slowly creep toward it and as I come near, I can hear something that sounds like an audio or tape recording. I walk in to find Victor watching a video of my father and I playing outside our old yard and my breath catches when I see it. He turns around at the sounds of my surprise, and smiles.



“Anastasiya, I thought I heard you out there. Come sit down with me,” he says this calmly and politely. He gestures towards the chair next to him and I cautiously sit down. To this point I don’t know what to think of this man. His words are stuck like hot glue in my brain.



“I’ve vanted to speak viz you about your mission. You know ze the whole story about the man who took your father avay.” I nod. “He is out there, ruining other people lives just like you. Our plan is to send you to New York City, and you will finish him off for good and return safely along with your father and mother. I want you to think about your strengths and your veaknesses, and please Anastasiya, do not lose yourself in this.”




His words stuck in my mind for the next couple of days and finally my day of departure came. I felt and exciting rush run through me, but deep inside I know what I was about to do was nothing I could ever imagine living with for the rest of my life.

I enter a luxury suite hotel named The Grand Plaza in the giant New York City. The place looks well lit and gigantic flowers and a water fountain right in the middle of it. I get my first sense of what being in America means and I’m very satisfied with myself for a moment. My team had dropped me off around the corner at a coffee shop and had collected my thoughts and went through my plan once again before arriving here.




“Vonce you are near the hotel suite, ve are no longer going to be able to contact you, so please focus and don’t let anyone bother you,” says Sergey. My earpiece clicks off and I am left with the exciting buzz of the hotel. I am careful to keep my face away from the cameras and walk towards the elevators. I get up to the highest floor, and as I get off into the silent, or should I say mute hallway, I am greeted with golden luxury and an aromatic smell of lavender. I walk towards my destined room and I finally feel like I am part of them; the Russian Mafia. I stop every so often to check for any sounds, but it is strangely very quiet. I start thinking about my mother and father and how happy they will be to see me after so many years. Especially, how very complete I will feel once again.




Room 3110 is right in front of me and I hesitate before I go into action. I expect to see the man I have been waiting to kill all this time. I become angry and confident enough so I load my gun and knock the door down in front of me with a quick kick. The first thing I see is the blinding light coming from the chandeliers above me. The white walls start to jump out at me as I am filled in with the strong smell of coffee. I walk in the room cautiously and observe my surroundings. I hear nothing but the faint sound of a familiar T.V. show playing from the living room. I feel a burning gaze on my back and I spin around ready to pull the trigger. I point the gun at his head and I am furious and ready to complete the mission, but it’s like the time stops.





A second goes by but I can’t bring myself to shoot the gun in my hand. I lower my gun just enough to be eye-level. His fiery brown eyes bring back a memory of that night so many years ago. They way those eyes looked at me when he told me good-bye.





“Papa?”