Mistaken Love

by Michelle H., Boothwyn, PA His name was Dan. At first he was nice; he seemed to be a sweet, sensitive guy. I thought that perhaps I had found my true love. We had a lot in common and got along well. But I did something wrong. See, there's this rule between best friends: never date each other's ex-boyfriends. I broke this rule. My best friend and Dan had been going out for about a month before they broke up. He started calling me because he needed someone to talk to. After awhile we started going out. Mistake #l. We hid it from my friend for a few weeks. Mistake #2. When we finally told her, she was upset, but we worked through it. She couldn't stand him, but she accepted it.

About a month and a half later things started going downhill. First, Dan started making me feel bad for hanging out with my friends. So I distanced myself from friends and spent most of my time with him. Mistake #3. Then he started to complain about my family. I know blood is thicker than water, but love is blind. I let his attitude toward my family rub off on me. Mistake #4. From there on it just got worse.

"You don't care!"

"You don't love me!"

That's all I heard. Then he introduced his hands to my throat a couple of times when I said something he didn't like. Between the physical and mental abuse, all I had time for was crying. It became a way of life. I was losing everything: my family, friends and my life.

Four months later on a freezing night, I was listening to him plan my life after high school. I just snapped. I walked him to his car and told him it was over. After a great deal of yelling he said something that would forever haunt me - "If I kill myself, it's all your fault!" What happened that night will be embedded in my memory for the rest of my life.

It took him a few weeks to realize that I really did mean it was over, that I wanted absolutely nothing to do with him. I was finally at peace. My family and friends were back in my life, even after everything I put them through. My life became much happier after that night. I know I have control of my life.

It used to hurt to talk about this horrible experience, but I know I'm not the only one to experience something like this. I've been to hell and back, as have many other girls. I will never travel down that dark path again. And for those of you who are on that path: save yourself. Turn around and run.