SomeBODY once told me... that Shrek Forever After (Shrek 4), was better than Shrek the Third for many reasons; some may argue that it was the best. In this article I will be ranking Shrek movies, in my opinion, from worst to best.

Shrek Forever After - Let’s start with the very few pros of this movie. According to my dear friend Julia Green, “The plot is solid and so are the characters.” Although this movie does have good villains and the plot makes a very distinct point of which Shrek signs a contract with the evil Rumpelstiltskin because he wants to feel like an ogre again like in the good old days, things go terribly wrong, bla bla bla, there are a few things that just don’t work for me. Just one of the little things that bothered me, Rumpelstiltskin makes an appearance in Shrek the Third, and looks nothing like he does in the fourth. Not only that, but in the third acts like a quiet harmless person.

Another thing is something I have been pondering for months now. It’s that Fiona was saying how she had to rescue herself from the tower because no one would come for her, which makes sense if Rumpel made Fiona and Shrek never meet in this alternate universe. Except in Shrek 2, the beginning shows Prince Charming finally making it to Fiona’s tower, to find out she was already on her honeymoon with someone else (Shrek). So, what I am confused about is why Fiona didn’t end up with Charming instead in this alternate universe, because he would have had to rescue Fiona if Shrek didn’t. What the frick, right? I have been looking for answers on the internet but no one seems to have this answer.

Shrek The Third - Now everyone I have talked with about which of Shrek 3 or 4 is better, all said that both of them were the worst out of the four. I agree with this, but I believe Shrek The Third does have its reasons to be better movie out of the two. Yes, this movie could improve on a few things, firstly, it’s the villain. They do use Prince Charming as the villain again, who still wants to claim the throne after the King passes, which yes, might have been a bit of lazy writing, but it shows how he wants to prove to his mother, who died, and everyone else that he can still be strong and courageous. Another thing that people comment on is that there are too many characters. This is the third Shrek and I think it’s about time we get introduced to more characters in this fairytale land. We meet the princesses, merlin, and of course, Arthur (Artie) Pendragon, Fiona’s cousin who is the only other heir than Shrek. I personally believe these characters are charming and funny and add some spice and excitement to the story. I think this movie also has a strong plot. Shrek really doesn’t want to become king, so of course he is going to go and find this dorky teenager to replace him, and like any story, finds trouble along the way.

This movie is still very light-hearted and witty, and shows how people like Artie can look past the fact that Shrek is an ugly ogre and see how caring he is on the inside. Maybe it’s just that he would do anything not to be King, but stereotypes were broken!

Shrek - It was very hard to decide between Shrek and Shrek 2. Let’s start with the soundtrack. It starts out with Shrek living his perfect life in the swamp, with the amazing Smash Mouth song, Allstar, playing in the background, creating all around great memes in mid 2017, making it such an iconic and even more well known song to this generation. I am also IN LOVE with the way they portray Shrek and Donkey in the beginning of this movie. After the montage of showing Shrek’s morning in his swamp, it cuts to an angry mob of humans with torches trying to capture Shrek, but Shrek seems to know how to deal with the situation and scare them off, like he does that sort of thing everyday. Before Donkey came along, it seemed that Shrek was totally content with being alone and everyone constantly wanting to kill him. He seems to be confused on why Donkey keeps following him. Once Shrek does a big roar to scare Donkey away, Shrek said “I’m and ogre! You know, ‘grab your torch and pitchfork!’ Doesn’t that bother you?” When donkey says “nope”, you can tell Shrek is surprised but happy that someone sees more in him than just a monster, and we realize that he may not actually be content with his life as it may seem. Later on in the movie we see that Shrek actually is a nice person, and to not judge a book by his cover.

The villain in Shrek is Lord Farquaad, A racist little man who wants to become king. However, he didn’t seem like a strong enough villain to me. He didn’t try to take anything away or do things that would be “villain moves”. When Shrek crosses Farquaad’s path, he sends Shrek on the quest to bring him the beautiful princess Fiona trapped in her tower. When Shrek arrives Fiona can’t seem to get over the fact that he rescued her instead of a handsome prince, but slowly realizes that Shrek has feelings too as the movie goes on. Shrek ends up with Fiona, and I like this movie because it’s all about racism and all characters warm up to Shrek in the end.

Shrek 2 - And last but not least, the best Shrek of them all. This movie had phenomenal characters, upgraded but more subtle adult humor, and the plot was spot on. There was also such a smooth transition from the last Shrek and it builds of of it in every way. Fiona, now as an ogre, brings Shrek back to her parents’ kingdom and her father is pretty unhappy with who his daughter is deciding to marry, wanting her to marry Prince Charming instead. Shrek drinks a magic potion which turns him and Fiona both into humans again. Now in this movie, the fairy godmother is the perfect villain. She partners with her stuck-up son Charming, which compliments her wondrously. She gives King Harold a love potion to put in his daughter’s tea, so the first person she kisses before midnight is the one she falls in love with. If she doesn’t kiss anyone before midnight, she will remain and ogre forever. This film has a great climax with Shrek speeding on a horse to stop Fiona from kissing Charming, but it was too late. Oh wait! Everyone is surprised here because it turns out, Harold purposely gave Fiona the wrong tea. The fairy godmother strikes her wand at Shrek to finish him off, but King Harold jumps in front of him and risks his own like for Shrek, turning him into a frog. Let’s not forget about the ending defeat of the fairy godmother, Simon Cowell crossover, and the big celebration party of “Livin’ La Vida Loca”. Her and Shrek decided they want to live happily as ogres together, and turn back to normal after midnight.

I make this my final conclusion, that Shrek 2 beats them all with the solid characters and their humor, and the message it brings of accepting each other the way they are. I am also extremely excited for the new Shrek 5 to come out in 2019, and is hopefully a step up from Shrek 4.