From the time that we were young children, we were taught to be nice to others. We were instructed, “Do unto others as you wish others to do unto you.” In other words, don’t make fun of people, don’t make jokes about their culture, and don’t assault their personal beliefs. Of course, even a dullard could see that this “golden rule” is bunk. Why shouldn’t we be able to crack jokes about what goes on in the world today, or about our next door neighbor, or about the latest celebrity scandal? After all, isn’t crude, unabashed humor the only way to understand others around us? Where would we be today without prophets of the phenomenon of satire such as Jonathan Swift, George Orwell, and Aldous Huxley? Nowhere! These great men spoke out against social evils of their time and new impending travesties. Swift modestly proposed a solution to poverty in which the children of the Irish would be given to the dining tables of their English Overlords, as the land-lords had already devoured everything else. Orwell displayed that even the simplest farm animals could embrace the amazing, surely beneficial, values of communism. Huxley revealed that unlimited access to every pleasure had no drawbacks because those whom detested such temptations as sex and drugs didn’t matter in such a brave new world. These seers of attestation have earned great places in heaven by calling out those that are surely destined for the inferno! They may very well walk among the gods. A shrine could be erected in every city and town to honor the great satirists, and even then they would not be adequately honored.

Only through shameless mockery of those who seek to defile our world can enlightenment be reached. And of the modern satirists, the crusade is much the same. Education and enlightenment! Modern satirists such as John Stewart, Stephen Colbert, Trey Parker and Matt Stone continue to hold the blazing torch in the quest for social teachings. Their ruthless deriding of social retardation and injustices makes for a better future. Shows such as The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, and South Park provide ethical role models for the youth of the world, showing audiences the difference between right and wrong, and educating them before they are given to the corruption of the world. The Daily Show and The Colbert Report expose children to pressing current events, teaching them what they really need to know in the most appropriate, realistic way possible. South Park educates children about social issues, such as economic crisis, and the importance of the political system. In order to guarantee that humanity grows in moral character, readings of satires, old and new, along with showings of modern satires, should be put on television day and night, and viewing of these channels should be mandatory for all under the age of twelve for at least 24 hours a week. Only through the indoctrination of our children can a certain future of a lifetime of benevolent social, political, and ethical beliefs be tightly secured.