Do you ever get that gnawing feeling in the pit of stomach at the very thought of an afterlife, at the thought that somewhere out there is a world that you cannot touch until your soul leaves its home? Do you ever have moments where you think how scary it would be to die because may be, just maybe, there is nothing after this- there is no hope beyond the jaws of terminal silence and nothingness- death.

In our world, no one wants to talk about afterlife; yeah, people want to talk about their “beliefs” but no one ever touches on the subject of death- ending and permanent. It makes you uncomfortable, anxious, and terrified. The thought of leaving the world you have resided in for years, and going away… all alone.

But which is worse: the idea of going somewhere remote and strange and alienated from the world that has molded you into who you are and erasing everything that identify with you, or the idea of nothing- your soul sucked into the dark abyss where there is no life, no hope, no love?

I feel it eating at me sometimes, thinking that maybe what I’m doing here isn’t worth it, that in the end it’s all going away. Will I even remember that game, that story I wrote, the test I aced, that friend that changed my life? Where will all this I have built around me go in the end? When will it stop mattering, and when will I be ready to let go of it all? It scares me to be honest; the feeling of cold shivers nip down my spine like freezing kisses.

The soul is strong. It cannot fade. How can you feel the wind whispering sweet songs at your skin and never feel anything again? How can you be tied to something, a person, a talent, a faith in a God, so intricately and inexplicably and then just fade? How can you love a person… the hustle and bustle of the rhythm of a city beneath you… the cool calm breezes of the outdoors… and then that heart that beat solely for what you love just disappear?

If you think about all that you are, about the world that is around you, not just on this earth, of the planets, galaxies- light-years beyond even our deepest knowledge- and you, your soul, your person stronger than any of it out there, how can it not continue to press on and live after death?

In matters of the afterlife, it’s hard to have peace, even if you are like me and completely convinced someone is out there that loves us enough to save us from nothing but a black abyss. I still get the isolating feeling of dread at the thought that everything I know could be gone in a matter of a split second. But I have confidence I will be taken care of. I have confidence that I believe thus I shall live. And I have confidence that everything will be alright.

I have to wonder where the peace of the world lies. And as I wonder, I decide that restlessness in this earth cannot be ceased until the fear and dread of the world to come- or lack there of- dies with it. No one addresses afterlife cause no one wants to. No one wants to challenge others beliefs, faiths, and opinions, because it’s just too deep. But peace comes with understanding.

And understanding only comes with a little faith.