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Dear God
Dear God
Why does my heart hurt so bad?
I don’t
Understand why I’m so sad
I feel
Such a relentlessly deep pain
The ache
Throbs round my heart in cold chains
I’m not
Scared, I don’t think, of the darkness
It’s just
Hard when the world is lightless
I can’t
Breathe when my life is broken
I must
Hold on ‘til hope’s reawoken
‘Til then
I’ve gotta trust all the shattered
Pieces
Of my heart really matter
If not
How can I cope with the fear
Drowning
With no rescue near
Tears fall softly
On the ground around me
Blood-red roses flower from the rain
As the night surrounds me
I reach out, touch nothing
But the moonlight’s dead white stain
I know
There’s something out there for me
It’s you
And yet I cannot quite see
Beyond
The sorrow, loss, and sadness
I might
Succumb to endless madness
I don’t
Know, can you even hear this?
Or is
My prayer lost in the stillness?
Where are
You God? You said You’d always be there
I thought
That meant someone finally cared
I guess
That I was wrong to hope for
A love
That never closes the door
Thorn in my heart
My world fell apart
So much for wishful thinking
Plunged cold through my skin
Drink it in
Light fades, cannot breathe, I am sinking
It’s black
And there’s nothing around me
I’m cold
In a void, I am empty
There’s no
Echo, no silence, no feeling
In this
Place, this vacuum, breath-stealing
I can’t
Think, can’t hurt, cannot tire
Maybe
God was always a liar
He said
There was burning and screaming
But I’m
Only drifting and dreaming
Is this
What it feels like to be free?
To feel
No more pain and suffering?
Then why
Do I feel so alone?
My heart
Has been turned into stone
I thought I was done
I had won
I had reached the end of all things
But if I can’t feel
How can I heal?
A scarred heart that can’t bleed cannot sing
My joy
And my laughter were lost
My love
And my memories were the cost
To rid
Myself of all my pain
No tears
Was my pitiful gain
Now I
Can no longer even mourn
The loss
Of my heart so forlorn
I’m trapped
In an endless nothing
I can’t
Replace my everything
I wish
Release had come more sweetly
I guess
This is eternity
“O my God, no! This cannot be happening!”
“Call nine-one-one, she’s still breathing!”
“Don’t let go, just hold on - God, I need her!”
“Don’t be scared, I’m right here”
“God is with us everywhere”
(“Please God, please, not her too. I can’t lose her”)
Heartbeat
Throbbing in my ears
Gentle
Touch that calms my fears
Whispers
Prayers to God above
Bathing
My soul in precious love
Raindrops
Falling wet upon my hand
“Father,
I don’t understand
Thank you
For giving her back to me
Dear God
Help her to truly see
Your love.”
I thought my life was through
And yet
Everything is somehow new
“You should have told someone
You’re not the only one
To feel crushed by your worry and fear
You’re not alone
You can always come home
I will always, always be here.”
God will
Never leave or forsake me
I can
Rest secure in your safety
You have
Rescued, redeemed me
Given
A second chance to me
I see
Now that nothing is hopeless
My life
Has priceless worth and purpose
Above
Me the clouds leave the sky
I won't
Be afraid now to cry
Some times
Tears deserve to be shed
I know
That the best is ahead
When I
Feel like I can’t go on
And I
Can only think of what’s gone
That’s when
I remember your mercy
Father
You have given me victory
Over
My fear and depression
The war
Is already won
Dear God
You make the hurt not so bad
I don’t
Have to always be sad
I feel
Finally freed from my pain
The ache
Is now gone with my chains
I’m not
Scared anymore of the darkness
It’s just
Hard when the world is lightless
I can’t
Mend everything that is broken
I must
Hold on ‘til hope’s reawoken
‘Til then
I know you make all the shattered
Pieces
Of my heart really matter
If not
I could not cope with my fear
Dear God
Hold me ever near
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