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What I've got now
What I’ve got now?
Well, I could count it off
Ticking the way down my fingers.
Pausing to think, act intelligent.
But what I've got now,
That fits on one hand.
One finger even.
One blink in your eyes
As I swallow in shame
Cause all I've got
Is this pile of mistakes.
It lies, there, by my feet,
I shuffle my feet to try to cover
But no, you would be the type.
Check under the kitchen sink
Glance at the corner of the carpet
So I just sigh, look away,(mentally kick myself for skipping the broom)
Away anywhere
And listen to your voice in sickening sweet
Talk on. And on.
About what I’ve got
This new beginning.
You tell me to call it a new start,
a fresh day
Pull yourself up!
Smell the coffee!
So I do, you know.
I do what you say
But it’s just the same really
I burn the coffee
Until it takes a brush to clean the pan
No biggie, really.
Love the aftertaste
And you know, that first day, new start?
Great shinning new slate?
Well, I tripped. Spilled milk
(But hey, I hid my tears.)
And maybe Im ok with that
Cause Im going to get where Im going anyhow
Back to where I’ve been.
And I’ve been everywhere, man.
I do tell you.
To hell
and back, because Im tough.
eat nails and spit rust
Or so they say
So, I pry myself up from the floor(never was…comfortable)
I drink my coffee.
Mop up the milk
Remind myself to fix the leaking faucet.
And I glance under the table
At my new beginning.
New perfect, untarnished shinning start.
And I do exactly what you tell me
In all honesty
I look that beginning in the face
And tell it the story of what it is
Its my last pinky finger
On my last calloused hand
In is my slate
For my new mistakes
And all possibilities for messes.
Scars and painful stories to tell.
And I smile.
At what I’ve got now.
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