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Losing You
My heart aches
From the loss of you
Everyday that I'm still living
I wish that you were too.
When I look at your picture
So many memories flood back
Reminding me of you
The one person in my life I now lack.
Can't you see me grieving
From up above?
Can't you see you're hurting
Someone that you love?
You know I'm going to miss you
Every second that I breathe
The fact that you're gone
Is still hard to believe.
But I'll remember
To keep a smile on my face
Because right now I know
That you're in a better place.
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This article has 33 comments.
aww....that obviously came from the heart. good job!! a lot of true emotion came out of this too. i liked the more positive outlook in the end.. :)
and im sorry for ur loss
simon cowell feedback--you asked for it!
I like this poem. It's short and sweet and I especially loved the last stanza which is heart warming.
The only things I question are: can you lack a person? I know what you meant but... I feel like that needs a fix
Also, how did the person who died hurt someone that she loves? (second stanza) I feel like she didn't intend to hurt anyone by dying and that the speaker in this poem is missing the person who died, not accusing them and being like "I can't believe you did this to me!!!" I get the feeling the poem is more "I'm going to miss you and I'll always cherish you." and that one stanza might be out of place.
I hate to start this way but, here it goes.
THIS was great, far better than the last thing i read! you really did great iwht this one.
I have to say now, I'm sorry for oyur loss, I know what it's like to lose someone that your close to. You expressed yourself very accurately and positively. You brought tears to my eyes, and this is a feat that is very rarely accomplished.
Amazing job! Keep it up! :)
Let me start off by saying, I am very sorry for your loss.
I love the rhyme in this poem, I hardly see it now a days. My favorite stanza is the second one, I think because the fact that you wrote 'when I look at youe picture, so many memories flood back, reminding me of you, the person that I now lack.' Those lines, (in my perspective) made your poem. Because to me it sounds like you are convincing yourself that it's okay to miss her, but also to remember her. Then your last line sealed the deal. 'You're in a better place.' Which to me means that you forgive her for leaving you, but will always and forever miss her.
This was an amazing and powerful write. :D
First person I lost; I'll miss you & love you forever! ?