I can feel the burn of an everlasting
Twisting feeling in my heart
Choking- gasping for breath
Warm salty tasting blood fills my mouth
No air-
No feeling in my hands
The knife is deep
But I will take the pain
I can survive
I can only wish this on myself
When I hurt others
I can’t scream
My mirrored image is pale
Pupils are dilated
A deep red pools my white shirt
I can feel my heart beat
Weaker,
And weaker
I see clouds
My world is beginning to darken
With one hand on the knife
And the other on my cross
I fall
It is a timeless fall
I don’t know when I hit the ground
I am so close to my death
Murdered by a disappointment
-One too many
My lungs feel like they’re going to explode
Maybe they already have
But I will survive
I can never get use to this pain
Yet I let it happen
Over
And over
I then feel a hand
But,
Oh my Lord
I have died
So close to the golden gates
I could almost touch them
But a sudden jolt brings me back
-Flying
-I am flying back to earth
They wouldn’t let me go
I hope I won’’t let it happen again
Dear Lord, Be my witness
Don’t let disappointment be my killer
Again