When we met, I wasn’t so sure about you
I’ve been known to be skeptical
but I was wrong to let my guard down
nonetheless we toppled each others guarded walls
erased our sacred lonesome lines
popped our bubbles of comfort
even spilled our secrets only to drink them back up again
I let myself become vulnerable
We fooled each other into thinking we were reliable
You see, we were both at fault for what happened
you were never good at sharing
and I was not known for listening

At one point, I felt secure
I believed in the purity of our friendship
before you, I thought friends only left marks of pain
hurt to get ahead
lied in order to gain trust
cheated to receive information
you see, I thought you were different

“never get attached to someone, promise me,”
my mother once exclaimed
I didn’t understand
I’m assuming she meant that everyone leaves in the end
“you’re right, that girl really cares for you,”
what changed?
“I see the way she smiles when you talk”
what happened?
“or how her eyes droop with respect for you”
why’d it end?
“I feel her comfort in your presence”
why’d it stop?
“keep your distance, my dear”
why?
“there’s nothing genuine in that smile”

Suddenly, things changed
I saw us being pulled in opposite directions
while I desperately tried to pull you back
you pushed me further away
I started to recognized your lies
and regretted telling you so much
this is when the rumors circulated
I was the victim
You the spreader
I cut all connections

Now as I locate you in the hall, I understand
as I approach, we both look away
as you become within earshot, I turn away
we’ve both moved on
we’ve labeled others our friends
ignored each others company
ripped up the pictures
and swallowed the memories

you were right mom
but for different reasons
I often got confused between friendship and bullying
I started to comprehend
that not everyone’s intention’s were authentic
and I’ve been known to have bad judgement
I finally understand why even my closest friends
turned their back
they knew too much
you know what they say
whomever one depicts close
is the one who holds a lot of power
it’s because they know you intricately enough
to know exactly where to strike