I was falling
from my throne in the sky
from the shelter of my life
from the once happy times
i was falling

fear, panic and depression
slowly took over
and i became a shell
of the person i used to be

i became almost lifeless
walking from class to class
always avoided
but never noticed
i was a ghost

nothing could stop me
from sinking deeper and deeper
into the darkness
no one really tried.

when the pain swelled up
to the point i could not take it
anymore
IT spoke to me

IT
the monster that lurks
in the back of my head
whispering promises of the blade
praising the joy it could bring
if i surrender.

yet i ignored it, the monster
and i went on with my
so called life.

till now

while i am alone
in a world full of people
i am so alone

rejected by those who i needed
ignored by those i wanted
forgotton by those i loved

now i am no longer falling
but landing in a darked place
where something speaks to me
where the monster sees me
he reaches out a hand and offers
his help

i fought those who fought me
i ignored those who ignored me
i forgot those who forgot me
i hated those who hate me
i regected the world that regected me
but


i welcomed that monster