I began with nothing
drained by the countless tears on my skin
breathless from the memory
sleepless from the pain
empty.
sucked dry of personality
of life
torn from limb to limb
thrown to build myself back up alone
shaken and stirred
like the coffee and cream that was never touched
not wanting to move forward
done, empty.
feeling alone in a room full of people was when I knew I had hit bottom
cold and exposed to nothing
at the lowest of lows
lonesome, done, empty.
lose one relationship lose all
the motto I once lived by
confided to a room
spacious and dull
sitting wishing I was stronger
wishing for a re-do
wishing to put a hole through that bare wall
wishing for my old life
regret, lonesome, done, empty.
pathetic
this once described me
yearning to be touched
and by someone who wouldn't ever look back at me again
selfishness, regret, lonesome, done, empty.
wasted energy
wasted pride
wasted life
depressed really
lost that time forever
I only did it to myself they all say
and he laughs and mocks at his success and my failure to move on
retched, selfishness, regret, lonesome, done, empty.
his sinister eyes will always burn into me
his picture will never be expunged from my memory
with all my power I want all traces to disappear, that we ever even touched each other
I am done saying goodbye
dwell, retched, selfishness, regret, lonesome, done, empty.
the darkness consumed me
but I see a faint glimmer of hope
it follows me for a time
and I reluctantly open my arms to this good looking glimmer
ease, dwell, retched, selfishness, regret, lonesome, done, empty.
this opportunity eventually with time and determination turns into a gorgeous bright light
before I open myself to this new chapter
he, the bright light sweeps me off my feet
he is nurturing and careful
shine, ease, dwell, retched, selfishness, regret, lonesome, done, empty.
he changes my life
I am proud
I am confident
moving on is a blessing
he is a blessing
I am new
I was given my re-do I always prayed for
my fresh start
to feel worthy
I owe myself to him
forever and ever
LOVE, shine, ease, dwell, retched, selfishness, regret, lonesome, done, empty.